This is the most amazing movie I have ever seen. This is art. This movie will become minimum 10% of my personality from today until the day I die. I walked out of the movie theater a changed man. Some of my favorite moments from the movie:
Dakota Johnson starts off the movie by stealing a taxi. Nobody questions this. She spends the entire movie driving this stolen taxi. She removes the license plates from the taxi to apparently make it more inconspicuous (???). She crashes the taxi into a diner, completely ruining it. She still drives the taxi. No character questions this at all. This has become her car. She then randomly decides to go to PERU (????). She drives the taxi to the airport. Then she drives back home in the taxi. This implies that she parks the stolen taxi, which is beat up, busted, and has no license plates, at the airport for at least a week with nobody asking questions.
Dakota Johnson's sole superpower in this movie is vehicular manslaughter. I am not kidding. The main way she deals with the bad guy is by crashing a big vehicle into him unexpectedly. Not once, but twice in the movie. Also, this bad guy can see the future. And it still happens. Incredible.
This movie is sponsored by Pepsi. Dakota Johnson spends five minutes of the movie trying (and failing) to open the most blue, unblemished can of Pepsi I have ever seen in my life. Five minutes she is just holding this thing, rubbing it, stroking it like a genie, pulling the tab, tapping it. She never opens it.
Also, the villain is defeated when the gigantic neon letter P from the logo on the exploding Pepsi-Co factory falls on him and squishes him to death.
There is not a single line in this movie spoken by the villain that was not ADRed. It's fantastic. He sounds exactly like Tommy Wiseau.
During a dramatic flashback in the movie, we watch Dakota Johnson's mother find out that her child was going to have a disability. But in case any of the viewers are too dull to interpret the literal dialogue that she is saying correctly, Dakota Johnson is providing CONSTANT dialogue in addition to this explaining to the dull viewers exactly what's going on. "But I don't have muscular distrophy..." "So THAT'S why you went to find the spiders." And my personal favorite, "You did it..." The way Dakota Johnson says "You did it" is seared into my brain and will be forever how I say those words from now on. They are just too fucking funny.
Dakota Johnson uses the taxi from earlier to kidnap a bunch of teenagers and decides to leave them in the forest for hours. The teenagers literally say "Maybe you shouldn't be leaving us in a forest like this?" and Dakota is just like "No stay right there, byeeee" and then goes back to NYC in the stolen taxi and cries with her cat about her mom and spiders. Then she gets mad when the teenagers go to a diner to get food because she also left them in the forest without anything to eat and without any way to contact her. In fact the moment a teenager mentioned a cell phone, she immediately threw the cell phone out the window without asking any questions.
This movie is OBSESSED with letting you know that it takes place in the 2000s. Britney Spears' 'Toxic' plays on the radio and the DJ is like "This song is going to be a HUGE hit!" Dakota parks her stolen taxi in front of a Dangerously In Love billboard. Dakota spends 120 seconds anxiously listening to a voicemail message on her ancient home phone to progress the plot.
Dakota Johnson falls into the river and gets hit in the eye with a firecracker (exploding Pepsi factory) and is blinded after she defeats the villain. The girls she's taking care of have to pull her out of the river and perform CPR on her. This exact sequence of events (minus the blinding) happens earlier in the movie.
Dakota Johnson then goes to the hospital. Nurse asks "Oh, is everyone here family?" Dakota Johnson says (with the sappiest smile ever, and with a ridiculous bandage covering her eyes) "Yes, they're mine" and "I have everything I need right here" (blegh)
Then the last five minutes of this movie are the most hilarious five minutes I've ever seen in cinema ever. Everyone in the theater was cackling. I was almost crying from laughter.
Dakota Johnson has the fugliest and most ridiculous pair of sunglasses I have ever seen in my life. There is also this ugly fucking SPIDERWEB WINDOW that apparently got added to her apartment that it is never explained how it got there. Also, SHE IS IN A WHEELCHAIR!!!! Girl is just blind!!!!!! WHY IS SHE IN A WHEELCHAIR????
Well the girls she's watching get back home. Then she does the slowest, funniest, most dramatic and comedic turn around in the wheelchair to face them I have ever seen. And the sunglasses just make it so much worse. By her smile alone you can tell she is finished with this movie and wants her paycheck so she can get the fuck out. Hilarious.
Absolutely the most incredible thing I have ever seen.
I went into this movie expecting it to be bad, which is fine, I've seen bad movies before and lived. Having now experienced both, I feel qualified to say: this movie is worse than brain cancer.
P.S. The movie theater we go to was selling Aquaman 2 novelty cups to everyone who ordered a large. I joked to my partner, "You're gonna be wishing we saw Aquaman instead by the time we're done with this." I was not wrong
"When you take on the responsibility, great power will come.”
If you were here to see Sydney Sweeney she’s in a spidey suite for 25 seconds of the movie. This movie is goofy. The Amazon spider people had me dying laughing. The dialogue is poor, not as poor as Sony is to be making this garbage. No explanation other than for the trailers to have villain look like spiderman. The action is lame, but atleast how awful the third act set piece looks made it slightly entertaining. I’m begging you Sony please stop making these. I’m sure Kraven will be just fine…..
The acting was awful. The story was stupid. Saw this for free, but still want my money back.
I thought it was pretty neat. It's not Endgame, but it's not trying to be. It's a pretty small, kinda old-school self-contained superhero movie that doesn't do much to heavily worldbuild. It doesn't even have a post-credits scene with Sam L Jackson. But I thought it was pretty neat for what it is.
Movie isn't as bad as everyone says it is. Treat it like an origin story movie that sets the scene for a larger universe...
Yes, first hour is pretty slow and at times the dialogue is clunky but you can still find enjoyment out of the film.
Damn, we're already milking early 2000s culture to trigger the dopamine buttons? Sometimes I wonder how blockbusters in the future will try to evoke the current era. How do you copy an era that's almost nothing but nostalgia, an era that coasts almost entirely on recycling stale ideas, IP and music from 20 to 40 years ago? Madame Web finds itself at a similar creative dead end. Why does Sony keep persisting on reviving this wave of forgotten B-movies from the early 2000s? I had some fun with Venom because of Tom Hardy's ridiculous performance, but I see no artistic merit with this or Morbius. It feels like everyone involved is several degrees of incompetent, or they simply didn't care. In fact, I probably already put more effort into this review than these screenwriters did with their script, so I see no reason to analyze this any further. Avoid at all cost.
1/10
If only I can get my time back, what disaster of a movie. I couldn't think that Marvel could do worse than they already have but somehow they did with this.
First trailer dropped and I'm feeling pretty meh about this so far.
March 15, 2024 update. It was much worse than I ever expected. I doubt S.J. Clarkson will ever direct again. Pretty impressive production for a CPR training video though.
Ouch, that average rating! I'm not going to lie though, I genuinely had a fun time watching 'Madame Web'... perhaps I should be keeping that fact quiet?
I don't know what to say, I found it to be suitably entertaining. I'm sure there are plot holes aplenty (I noticed a few) and it probably makes zero sense/isn't a good adaptation compared to its source material or whatever but honesty... I don't care, it gave me enough enjoyment that I wasn't questioning anything about what I was watching.
The cast are probably the key factors as to why I did enjoy this. I previously knew of Dakota Johnson but hadn't actually seen her in anything properly, I found her performance to be more than noteworthy and she spearheads the film strongly. The trio of Sydney Sweeney, Isabela Merced and Celeste O'Connor are positives too.
Tahar Rahim's antagonist, meanwhile, is poorly written and portrayed, though I personally thought the actor did a good job. I have no complaints with anyone who appears onscreen to be honest. Away from them, the pacing and score are also standouts.
In my recollection of viewing this, I truthfully haven't got any issues with it. If it wasn't for the slight bad murmurs that I did hear about pre-watch (though not much of it as I avoid as much as I can with movies) and the reaction on sites like this post-watch, I'd not be questioning my thoughts about this whatsoever.
As I always say, to each their own. For me, gimme a sequel (as long as the cast remain, mind). Not even sorry.
Blatant, naked brand building. It’s not even bad in a fun way most of the time, just in a boring way. The shots are either inane or incompetent, the editing frantic and scattershot. Johnson’s fully checked out, the villain is painfully ADR’d and brings to bare the awful script, Ben and Mary are such hangovers of a previous script. The movie’s not about saving Peter Parker anymore. Even the three girls feel like leftovers from the Spider Women movie they could never get off the ground. You find yourself longing for the ridiculous lines and terrible deliveries to make fun of between the mind numbing plot. The movie takes place in 2003 and the villain explicitly uses tech brought on by the Patriot Act but it will not stop to comment on these things at all, it has nothing to do with what you would be generous to call the themes of the movie. It’s blatantly only to connect to Peter and to set up the villain, respectively, much like the movie itself. It’s yet another attempt to launch a Sony live action Spiderverse, and everything in the movie exists around that, inert and limp.
You know what time it is, “It's Webbing Time”.
Dreadful Piece Of Diarrhea RATE 0/10
That's it.....? It really was not that horrible. I was entertained the entire movie and it was fine.
Not good, NOT HORRIFIC - but fine.
The hype for how bad this movie was REALLY overdone. There were some really bas aspects but most of this was surprisingly competent.
The ending sucked though and felt super rushed. But overall, it was ok.
People praising Avatar like the king of movies and rating Madame Web with 1/2 stars, it's the internet in a nutshell. I'm giving it 1/2 extra star just because of all your hate and will hope for a sequel. Now back to drinking Pepsi and using the web.
Movie wasn’t bad or anything just felt rushed. There was no arc where she understood her powers or anything of sort. in the end, it was underwhelming
You speak of spiders and experiments and Amazons,
You tell tall tales of a film experience that is a failure of disaster levels.
The likes human kind have never seen before.
You dare preach these claims and thump your hyperbole on your virtual soapbox for the whole world to hear and partake
Yet I tell you what these eyes have seen.
These eyes have seen a flying vampire man.
These eyes have seen a curly red haired wig.
These eyes have bear witnessed to a turd in the wind.
Yet I still ask, “IS THIS ALL YOU HAVE?”
“THE BEST YOU COULD MUSTER?”
FOUR WOMEN SLEEPING THROUGH THEIR LINES?!
PERUVIAN MYTHICAL SPIDER-PEOPLE?!
YOU THINK THIS WILL DEFEAT ME?!
I chuckle to myself and whisper “Give me MORE”
I only become more powerful, more immune.
I become INFINITE
I anxiously anticipate Lion blood superpowers in mere months time
Whys everyone hating on this film so much?? Sure its no Endgame but it's a fun popcorn movie as its meant to be. Doubt I'll ever watch it again, but it's no worse than many other recent Marvel movies. Don't be afraid just watch and judge for yourself.
Super Stoked
For This Can't Wait
For Valentines day
Feb 14th 2024
(I might actually enjoy
that day for the first
time in like forever).
This Looks Epic AF.
"Peter Tingle 2.0"
Wtf did I just watch? Horribly written, horribly directed, the three girls suit up for less than 30 seconds, and it's all flashforward montages, what a fucking tease. Awful film, thank god for cam copies.
lmao, they thought putting two attractive women will do the job. Everything is shitty and crappy.
What an stupid movie… 25 mins into the movie and couldn’t take it anymore. Funny how politically correct this is… they had to represent a white, Latino snd black as main characters… very retarded
This movie is insane and terrible and I think I need to watch it every day. I was laughing from the very first second. The fist indicator that this film was being phoned in by literally everybody was when the opening titles was just white text on a black screen. No one bothered to make even a 5 second opening title sequence. It's then immediately followed by an opening scene with some of the clunkiest dialogue I've ever heard, combined with the most laughable zooms in the editing. It's truly a bizarre thing to see.
Dakota Johnson is giving an absolute max of 80% at any given moment, and has a few line deliveries that had me dying laughing, both intentionally and unintentionally. Everything to do with the villain and his assistant from Girls is pure insanity, from "de-aging" the girls 10 years by simply removing their masks in the picture, to all the ADR, it's all confounding. Adam Scott is certainly there, saying his lines, along with Emma Roberts. Neither of them have much of an impact on the story except to tangentially connect Cassie to an infant, alternate universe version of a character we already know, but they sure are there and saying things.
TL:DR This movie makes every wrong choice and I want to spend the rest of my life trying to understand it
Wow, some of the reactions to this film are over the top, anyone scoring it a 1 really needs to chill and take a walk in nature to calm down - is it a work of genius? No, but it's a fairly decent adventure to disengage your brain for and munch some popcorn to on a weekend. I, for one, need this sort of distraction after a week in reality. Just enjoy it.
Not as bad as some made it out to be. Not great but not bad. It takes time to get going but the last 30 minutes are much better. Set's up for a second movie :cinema:. :thumbsup_tone1:
Movie makers have run out of ideas and the ability to create good movies. The only good part about this was The Cranberries during the closing credits.
Made it 5 minutes in before I had to stop watching, absolutely horrible writing.
Lol seems like every Marvel womens movie is trash, ma marvel not so bad tho :joy:
It seems like Marvel can't get on their feet again.
I didn't enjoy the story at all. Can recommend to watch it one time, if you got nothing else to do.
I haven't seen product placement this aggressive since Transformers.
A bad script and bad directing can make any great actor seem terrible.
I can not believe that someone was paid to write this script. A monkey with a typewriter could write a better one. Terrible. Just a terrible movie. Don't waste your time watching it.
Not that bad! It was decent, of course there was tons of product placement, the fact that the villain is dubbed was hilarious, the jungle people were campy, but overall I enjoyed it more than let's say The Marvels. Of course the main characters are not superheroes yet so that is a let down, but it was a fun little origin movie if you don't take it seriously, I wouldn't even mind watching a sequel
Absolute garbage of a movie don't waste your time with this one
Like a web in a no-fly zone, this spider died somewhere in the w̶r̶i̶t̶i̶n̶g̶ r̶o̶o̶m̶ AI program.
A great cast on paper but the results are horrible... the acting is poor all around, even Dakota Johnson and Sydney Sweeney are cringe and overact. The story is déjà vu and good luck convincing me this wasn't written by AI. The action sequences are so forgettable and uninspired, awkward character interactions, weird musical choices, poor editing, generic characters and cheap effects.
To Sony: "Are you alright dear?"
It's really not as bad as all the incels, white supremacists and misogynists will have you believe. It is a bit lame though.
Wasn’t that bad as people made it out to be. The aspects that I liked was the visuals and cinematography. What I didn’t like was the weak characters who had their forced sad stories, monotonous and bad acting especially by Sydney and Dakota, weak script with no emotions and bad jokes even with Adam Scott. The villain was terrible as well, uninteresting suit and bad acting/dialogues.
We know the good thing about the future is that it hasn't happened yet. The acting of the leading lady is very good. I think he really has a very special power in the Marvel universe. Not to mention the others. The movements he teaches at the end when the heart stops, etc. are very nice details. Thank you for your efforts.
Marvel should sue Sony for damaging the Spider-Man brand.
it's a prologue of the madame web, a character of spider man that appeared the first time in the 80s and it's not all that bad imo.
Marvel have worse movies out there without all this hate.
Many people like it and many people hate it without watching the movie, overall i had a good time watching it.
Sony looked at all those memes about Morbius being the worst spiderverse movie and said “challenge accepted.”
There are moments in this movie that are "so bad it's good", but mostly it's just bad.
- Hearing Sydney Sweeney yell "Cassie!" is so confusing
- "But I don't have a neuromuscular disorder..."
- Dakota Johnson with the Captain America shield
- Unlike those old fashioned movies that plot an emotional arc cross the course of the movie, this one crams the entire emotional arc into 3 minutes
- My favorite part of the movie was the Cranberries song in the credits
Morbius was better…
I had this running in the background, so I may have missed it, but I don’t think there was a single suit-up scene for any of the main characters. The villain suits up and instantly takes his mask off when he confronts the heroes. Straight to DVD stuff. Why did they even bother if they were going to half-ass it this bad?
I was so excited to see this movie and I wasn’t expecting it to be a summer blockbuster either. I had fun watching this a with a little suspension of disbelief it worked for me.
Three really strong emotional moments for me, starting with, "Please help us, Cassie." I'd almost give it a nine out of ten.
This is a story driven pic, as opposed to SFX or Action based pics.
And, I've never had this strong a reaction to a CAM version -- it's usually the opposite.
Madame Web is like rest area tampon dispensers: lacking style, only works at random moments, and not intended for me.
And they told me I didn't have the right to write a novel about a woman superhero...
I'm all about female led and directed Marvel movies but this whole thing felt like an overlong info dump that didn't have enough strength of its own to hold up the franchise it's trying to build.
What a waste of a perfect cast.
I kind of expected that 'Madame Web' wouldn't be a good movie. That's why the main question for me was whether it was better or worse than 'Morbius'. In the end, I can say that it's maybe slightly better, but still not even remotely worth seeing.
Lead actress Dakota Johnson isn't the problem, though, even if she doesn't necessarily appear as if she enjoyed being on set. On the other hand, Tahar Rahim is a disaster as the villain, Ezekiel Sims. He delivers one of the worst performances I've ever seen in a superhero movie. Sydney Sweeney, Celeste O'Connor, and Isabela Merced, meanwhile, are not worth mentioning as future Spider-People. Each of them is assigned exactly one character trait; they end up being nothing more than that.
A big problem with the movie is that you spend about two hours wondering when it's finally gonna kick into gear - and then it just ends. Occasionally, something is teased that could come in a later movie and would certainly be much more worth seeing. So 'Madame Web' works more or less like an overlong post-credit scene. In the sense that the only purpose of the movie is to foreshadow a more interesting movie that will surely never come.
I kind of feel sorry for Marvel Studios. They're only releasing one movie this year to address superhero fatigue, and then Sony swoops in. I'm sure there are still a lot of moviegoers who don't understand the difference between the MCU and Sony-Marvel. And then this movie is intentionally designed to somehow fit in with the Tom Holland movies. That's definitely going to cause some people to draw the wrong conclusions.
To sum up, I can only describe 'Madame Web' with one word, and that is Pepsi (in fact, with the aggressive product placement, you can kind of draw a parallel between MCU/Sony and Coca-Cola/Pepsi).
So many plot issues. So many... horrible writing and directing. Never let the director direct another movie or the writers write any more.
I thought this movie was gonna be good. Until the reviews came out. The movie is a 5 at best with cringe acting and even just bad acting. My complaints about this movie are
1. Dakota Johnson
2. Dakota Johnson's terrible acting
3 The movie is basically 2 hours long with nothing great about it.
It is an utter disappointment and disgrace to the Spiderman universe. Sony is exceptionally bad at making a good Spiderman movie anymore. Just stop making them Sony.
WORST MOVIE EVER! I wasted my time...
Absolute rubbish. Poor acting and the sciences are very fractured and it has poor dialog also.
Even after watching it a second time I still love it
The movie is not soooo bad. It is somehow better that Morbius I think
This had a fine cast, albeit a bit old to be playing 16-year-olds, but the script and direction were not good. I found Dakota Johnson's character to be really unlikeable for most of the film, and there was no look into the three members of her cohort, which seemed like a really wasted opportunity. What was the plan, to tell their backstory in a sequel? Tahar Rahim is a fine actor, but he was not good in this, and for all the vitriol against this film, it wasn't that bad, but it also wasn't good, as it really wasn't a superhero film, so I'm not really certain why they marketed it as such. To give you an idea of how bad the scripting/dialogue was, there was a scene in the first third of the film, where the four main characters are standing in a park getting to know one another a bit. Celeste O'Connor complains that her father makes a fortune polluting the oceans with plastics, which would've been a worthy gripe had she not less than 30 seconds earlier finished eating a bag of beef jerky before tossing the empty plastic bag into the bushes. Seriously, no one in the entire filmmaking process caught this?
I've got nothing against anyone involved in the making of that movie, but what a boring mess it was !
Hey SONY wtf is wrong with you ??!!!
It's actually not as bad as people say it is......it's worse. There were so many ways it could have gone to be a proper movie and they opted to go the worst way possible.
One would think there was no source material for the character
I went into this movie with very low expectations. It wasn't so bad.
This movie would have been better as a feature length pilot of a TV series. Like Charlie Angels with Madame Web as Bosley.
I hated the movie Shazam. Specifically because he and all that power and did nothing but run the entire movie. As far as this movie; how many times does she have to see something to get the point. Like dam, how many people have to die or be in harms way before she takes action.
Its about the 3rd act in the movie when she finally starts hitting back .
I watched it. I enjoyed the movie but her character was extremely annoying
This is one of the worst movies I have ever seen. There’s no saving grace. The VFX suck. The acting is awful. And the writing is atrocious.
Eatly in the movie (because it starts sucking very soon), I wondered how they got to film and release such a piece of shit. Since I can’t fathom anyone thought Madame Web was worth watching, my best guest remains that producers simply thought any extra work on the movie would be more expensive than it’s worth.
It makes me sad that Sony can keep getting away with that kind of shit.
SOO BAD. BUT THE ENDING GAVE ME HOPE THERE WILL GOOD MOVIES TO FOLLOW.
This is pure shit, avoid at all costs
Just watched this. If you take out any awful references to Spiderman which are few and far between, it's not that horrible a watch. They could've done more with the early 00's references. A 5/10 film about a psychic and 3 minions running around badly to avoid a killer.
A good idea so wasted. The film is uneven, at times it feels like a script was written on the knee. But an interesting cameo of Peter's family. :)
The actresses should go back to Euphoria or some stupid shows like that, they are supposed to represent strong women but they aren't quite good at it
It’s genuinely a terrible movie but its an enjoyable experience because you are laughing at how bad the writing is and the delivery is and in general how the cgi looks, or at least my friends & I were laughing throughout.
I’ve never seen 50 shades of grey so I don’t know if Dakota can do any better than this but jesus christ it genuinely just feels like Dakota Johnson was playing Dakota Johnson.
Adam Scott as Ben (PARKER! as they name dropped with 3 minutes left of the movie) was definitely the best one there and you could tell he was doing his best with the script given to him, I’m slightly biased because of his performances in both Parks and Recreation (my favorite sitcom since I was 10) and Severance (Phenomenal) but he was definitely the easiest to watch.
Emma Roberts showing up in this movie halfway through was a shock and she gave the performance she usually does (not great). And then all of a sudden she gives birth to Peter Parker ? Don’t exactly understand why the tie in happened but to be fair I don’t understand why most of this happened.
overall a terribly bad movie. I want to give it a 2-3 because of how hard I laughed but I do have to give it a 1. Though I almost want a sequel to this because of how bad it was, but Dakota will never try this again.
With the wide-spread scathing reviews and people telling me not to watch it, I expected an absolutely horrendous film. However, I'm glad saw it for myself because while it's not the greatest movie ever made, it's also NOWHERE near the worst.
6/10 - for the story (albeit understandably a little disjointed), the found family vibe and the cute costumes.
"Madame Web" was gentle fun, and I didn't hate it.
I went into this movie knowing about the ADR and how bad the movie was overall. And people kept saying how the actors had to work with a bad script. But watching this I found no excuses. Both Dakota Johnson and Tahar Rahim, they're both just bad actors. I can't believe the excuses some people make for them. I'm trying to end on a positive note so... Adam Scott is always brilliant. I think he would've actually make a good Uncle Ben.
Any Dutch people remember Enschede? And that was a smaller storage than this movie and it leveled the place.
Largely a waste of time because it is just so generic and the acting & script are poor.
The lead, Dakota Johnston, is weak. She has limited emotional range and - though I'm sure she is a lovely warm human - is just not a good actress.
The script is as perfunctory as anything AI can create. No emotion, just hitting the necessary words to transmit a plot.
It isn't horrendous. It's just par for the course where Marvel are concerned now. I wouldn't rate it any worse than Shang Chi or Captain Marvel.
The 00s element is beyond pointless as it seems to be ignored for the majority of the film. It just exists to seemingly be pre-iPhone.
If the audience accepts popcorn, then you'll never be presented steak...
Madam Web movie swings into theaters with all the grace of a clumsy Spider-Man wannabe. From the very first scene, it's like watching a spider trying to swing from a broken web - awkward and cringeworthy. The plot is as tangled as a web spun by a spider on caffeine, leaving viewers more confused than J. Jonah Jameson trying to understand Peter Parker's double life. The dialogue is as forced as a supervillain team-up, making even the most die-hard Spider-Man fans cringe in their seats.
If you're thinking of watching Madam Web, my advice is to run faster than the Flash on a caffeine rush in the opposite direction. Save yourself from the agony of witnessing a superhero movie gone terribly wrong. The only "amazing" thing about this movie is how it manages to disappoint on every possible level. It's like Venom without the cool factor, or a Spider-Man movie without the friendly neighborhood charm.
In conclusion, Madam Web is a cinematic disaster of epic proportions, making even Spider-Man's most notorious foes look like misunderstood heroes. Do yourself a favor and spend your time and money on something more enjoyable, like rewatching Tobey Maguire's Spider-Man movies for the hundredth time. Madam Web is a web you definitely want to avoid getting caught in - unless you enjoy feeling like you've been bitten by a radioactive disappointment spider.
This movie proves how over rated Sydney Sweeney is.
Without showing her tits, she's unwatchable.
Asked myself how bad can it be? Fucked around and found out.
After the awful reviews for this I had low expectations. The first 2/3 were okay, actually quite enjoyable in places. The young girls were good fun if a little annoying. The lead was a little light in charisma and the baddy minimal threat or explanation for their actions.
The last 1/3 though made no sense, it was all over the place and gave up trying to get to explain anything.
A very forgettable film.
No, you don't need to "see for yourself". It's as awful as everyone has told you. Not funny-bad, just woefully flat, lifeless and uninspired. Do literally anything else with the two hours you'll save skipping this. Read a book, meditate, learn how to do CPR correctly from a YouTube video; so many things you can do that are a better use of time than watching this vapid, hollow shell of a movie.
This review brought to you by the refreshing taste of Pepsi Cola:tm:
Horrible, the directing, the acting, the characters, the story dude WTH !! . I just wanted it to be over after 10 mnts in.
Rated a Connor 0, normal 2
30 mins in and the first problem I have is the over-dub of the antagonist. Beyond that the directing isn't great. The story itself isn't too bad right now. We'll see how bad it becomes.
The acting was great, everything else made no sense. I hope everyone on the crew never work on another film again.
aaaannnnndd.....just like Elektra and Daredevil, we will do our best to forget that this exists
For someone who sees the future, they should have seen this movie going to be a box-office bomb.
The concept is good, but everything else was wrong in this movie. bad writing, bad casting (Dakota is expressionless,robot by the end of the movie i actually started laughing on every line she said, terminator would have been a better casting),bad directing.
I think this movie will be a good reference in the future of what not to do.
I wont slate this more than it hasn't already been. I will say it not a bad idea of a movie but the script and acting let it down. Dakota Johnson should never have been allowed near this movie, she is emotionless as an actor and they should have known what they were getting. She does the same uninterested routine in all her movies and I suspect in real life.
For a madame webb movie this movie get a 8/10 for me but as a spiderman related movie this shit get a 5
The acting is good but oh my fuckin god this movie have alot of talking, guess that what madame webb is just like in the comics
Just came back from work. Could not sleep and I decided to torture myself by watching this POS! OMG!
I couldn't get past the 20 minute mark.
S
SPOILER.....Dakota not naked.....:weary:
Only watch this movie if you want to make fun of it.
I can not entirely explain how incredibly terrible this film is. Despite it just being a chaotic convoluted mess with no real cohesion the movie just shows viewers just have comic-book super hero burnout. It's everything you don't want in a super hero movie.
Madam Web - :heart:x5
I think I know why everyone kinda hates this movie - they were expecting a superhero movie - this is everything but that - it's basically the origin story of 4 superheroes but we never really get to the superhero part.
Aside from the above. There is also the bad script and wooden acting, no real character development etc, etc, etc.
But it's still an OK watch - it's not completely horrible but it's also not very good. It's a 1 or 2-time watch at best.
How I rate:
1-3 :heart: = seriously! don't waste your time
4-6 :heart: = you may or may not enjoy this
7-8 :heart: = I expect you will like this too
9-10 :heart: = movies and TV shows I really love!
One of those movies that are so bad that it's almost good. It's so cliche yet in your face that it cancels it out? I still can't believe what I watched. Some say it's worse than Morbius, but it's definitely better. Also, the cast and acting is so random that it makes absolutely no sense. All I know is Dakota needs to be in more comedies. She unintentionally carried this movie on her back. The editing, cgi, and everything in between were so rushed, and it's clear as day because absolutely nothing in this 'movie' makes sense. Watch it with company, it makes a huge difference. I want a number 2.
The design for Ezekiel's suit was cool and unique, but the rest of it would've been better of in the trash. Yikes.
I watched this last night. WTF were they thinking? First the 3 girls left a fire buring in the woods and just walked away? The girls got in the car with the pregnant lady then they were found. Should have just stayed hidden at the house. The girls are only in their suits in future visions. Did y'all even read the comics. The final version of Madam Web at the ending was just ridiculous
There was so much dumb stuff going on in tye movie its hard to single all of them out. Overall the. Overall was hot garbage.
She was such a better actor when she was being shown the red room.
Garbage...
Totally disappointed. Spider-Fan inside me is deeply offended by this pathetic film parody...
1/10
WHO TF IS RICHARD?!?
I am a big marvel fan.
I have denied it for a long time but now I can’t longer deny it longer… marvel is dead
The worst marvel and Sony movie ever, the storyline is bad, the acting was terrible, the visuals were disgusting, the visions were awful, we saw the 3 girls in action for about 20 seconds, the super hero outfits in those 20 seconds were ugly as hell, the spider people outfits were vomiting material, what was even the bad guys story?!
Peppa pig has a better story line then this piece of shit.
Don’t watch this
They say it’s horrible. Which it was but the ending. Looks like it should have just been a tv show. Movie done with now Let’s get a TV series going with the same actors.
How do these creators are getting work. Fuck this shit.
I wanted to like this but wtf. Worst climax ever.
Imagine 12 year old write a fan fiction. Somehow Somy got it and made a movie out of it using AI instead of high salary writers. With 2 wannabes girlboss writers with 2 editorial writers and an AI software. No matter how good the original story had been, the idea of using AI to write screenplay means removing the humanity out the equation at this stage of AI development. Don't bother with playing potentially influencial actors, they would just digging their own career graves.
I'm glad they loae money on this film coz if it succeeded, writers would lose their jobs.
2 questions, why did they think this movie casting was ok to go with? And why did they think the story was going to make them money?
A better cast might have made it work, and Madame Webb didn't need a 2 hour long origin movie.
Review by Matthew Luke BradyBlockedParent2024-02-16T17:12:39Z
Ladies & gentlemen, they & them,
Early 2000’s superhero movies are back, baby!
Madame Web is a top-tier dumpster fire.
It has some of the worst dialogue I have heard in a while. How are these writers, who brought us such gems as Dracula Untold, The Last Witch Hunter, Gods of Egypt, and the trillion-dollar hit Morbius, still working?
“Every day that goes by, my appointment with death gets closer.” is an actual line from the movie. There is plenty more to go around.
The editing and visual effects are atrocious.
The acting from everyone is awful. The line delivery is shockingly low energy, and I did not believe a word any of the actors were saying.
I have seen these actors do great work in the past, so this is 100% the director's fault here. It's crazy how a director can get piss-poor performances from good actors.
The characters had no chemistry with each other. The scenes together felt so awkward and unnatural.
There are so many character choices that don't make sense.
The villain fucking sucks. There is no real character to him. He's just a boring evil guy who wants to kill three “teenagers” because he dreamed of them killing him in the future. He is not threatening at all.
I noticed the actor who played the villain was dubbed over with ADR for most of his scenes. You can tell.
None of the humour landed. Painfully unfunny.
The 2003 pop culture references were a pathetic excuse for creating a time capsule setting.
Adam Scott and Emma Roberts have nothing to do here. You wonder why they are even there.
For a superhero movie, there are barely any exciting action scenes. Whenever there is some action, it's nothing special. I would not mind the lack of action if the story, characters, and acting were superb, but it has none of that.
The fact that the final battle scene takes place underneath a Cola/Pepsi sign is another example of the terrible product placement from Sony.
The final shot is the most embarrassing thing I have ever seen.
My jaw is on the floor of how a movie like this can be shit out by a big studio. Sony REALLY needs to cut it out with these unnecessary Spider-Man spin-off films.
Madame Web is the worst superhero movie ever made. Yes, I mean it. At least the other bad superhero movies had some redeeming qualities to it. But this movie has nothing. Everything about this movie is wrong. Fant4stic is better than this. It makes Morbius look competently made.
The current state of superhero movies is in trouble, and Madame Web is not helping.