I wanted to like it. I wanted more goofy shit and action from Savini, but there's just too much Tarantino. There's too much in the writing, too much in the style, and too much in his own character. I cannot stand how much of a creep he is, a problem that everyone in the movie is aware of, but no one does or says anything about despite his character driving the plot. They make him a foot-fetishist, which Tarantino clearly is himself, and while that's not inherently any creepier than any of the other fetishes the movie takes for granted (there's an entire monologue about p*ssy), he sure does manage to make it uncomfortable. Does he also have a kink about being kink-shamed? What was going through his head while writing this screenplay?
The whole second half of the movie is forgettable. It doesn't matter that they're vampires, it doesn't matter that Scott is adopted. It doesn't matter that Kate started out sheltered and mousey. Nothing about the characters matters at all. It's just some kinda entertaining gore. That last scene was pretty dope, though.
It is performatively a deconstruction of horror tropes, but as willing as it is to put them up on stage, it doesn't have anything interesting to say about them. But it's a pretty fun, goofy horror-action-comedy flick.
Look, cops are thick-headed, and I imagine office drone wannabe cops have even less going for them, but even I wouldn't have written two more incompetent investigators than Amos and Deena. Bravo.
"You know, when a star dies, it continues to shine its light across the universe for many millennia to come. You just gotta be looking for that light" is a powerfully nonsensical string of words, perhaps the most powerful in the history of language. It also sums up the movie rather well. I have no clue what happened.
Fantastic movie. One minute the characters are throwing out scientific facts and terms like it's Beakman's World, and the next they're horribly misrepresenting evolution by natural selection. Everyone behind the film have all probably noticed this as well. It mat well have been intentional.
Anyways, it's weird that Hollywood ramped up misogyny by turning Olivia Wilde into a living Even Horizon. This is part of the joke, right? Hello?
Easily one of my favorites. Some of the CGI is goofy and the characters don't always think things through as much as I would like, but for a 15-year old, small budget indie film, it all holds up extremely well. It's tense, well-acted, and (most) of the characters feel real.
This movie is aggressively mid-tier, even for yet another low-budget horror film about motherhood written by dudes.
Hilarious trash. Are warrior nuns the next big thing? Hope not.
On its own, this is not a bad movie. In fact, there are some parts that I consider stellar bits of horror. The acting is great. James Liddell is incredible and the scenes where he is alone are my favorites. This isn't for any dislike of the other actors or characters, but because these are the scenes where the movie is allowed to be itself and not info-dumping some lore that - let's be real - isn't worth anyone's time. Cognetti has a keen sense of what makes good found-footage horror and I'm amped to watch more from him, but the Hell House saga is profoundly uninteresting and it's time to let it go. Secrets have been revealed and character backstories have been explored. I don't know what's going on behind the curtain - maybe he has some contractual obligation to Shudder? - but I'm hoping we get something fresh from Cognetti before another Hell House movie.
You cannot convince me this isn't some sort of commentary on auteur horror and cynical Hollywood cash grab adaptations of creepypastas.
Good lord, this movie is quantum bad.
This is by far the least bad Insidious film and is almost good. With just a bit of rewriting, it could have been a much better standalone film dealing with the traumatic aftermath of living in a horror movie. As is, it's actually decent at conveying imperfect people coping imperfectly with horrendous circumstances, but in my view the end message gets muddied by special magic-boy powers and justifying the story in terms of the previous movies.
I am so floored right now because this was so much fun to watch.
I can see where the story was trying to go, and while there were some interesting parts, it doesn't tie any of its ideas together.
It's not that the movie or any of the stories are completely bad, it's just that they all could have used more time in the oven. Dreamkill was interesting, but TKNOGD was the biggest disappointment. There was so much potential, but it just fizzles out.
Such a weird movie. The two leads look like they could be brother and sister. Using heavy topics like suicide as a way to enact revenge is gross.The atmosphere is ok, I guess, but other than Peter Stormare, this flick doesn't have much going for it.
A well acted and crushing portrayal of loneliness and a person reaching out for human connection. It can feel a bit like its dragging itself to the end, but otherwise it's a stellar slow-burn.
I don't understand at all what happened. Does that make the movie bad? Not necessarily. I'm not particularly smart and may just be missing important context, but nothing made much sense to me.
A perhaps overly-ambitious indie film that ended up a confusing mess. Still amazed at the audacity of the man who just popped a squat on the house deck to drop a deuce.
This is the best movie ever. Totally flawless.
Genius move to make the dialog so quiet that you have to turn up the volume so the shitty jumpscares will pop your head like a balloon. Just awesome.
Content warning for graphic depictions of domestic violence.
What a crude attempt at horror. Things happen at a breakneck speed, moving from one tired horror cliche to another completely untethered by motivation or reason, sometimes only to remind us that we are watching a horror movie. Shallow characters with empty dialog bumble awkwardly through an absurd plot and I cannot say that the movie is worth watching.
However, I am tempted to give this movie a perfect 10/10 because Candice Rose (Ms. Jude, married to her firm) is brain-endingly hot as the power-suite dommy boss. She should get her own spin-off.
I didn't even know is was possible to make a movie this bad on accident let alone on purpose.
Like the first one, Boogeyman 2 is horrible. One key difference is that while the first Boogeyman featured Lucy Lawless, the second has Renee O'Conner.
The movie is very much what you expect: Christian wish-fulfillment. It's also extremely bad.
There's worse movies out there, but the wooden reading of dialog at double speed is extremely jarring and hard to watch.
Warning: there is some very graphic violence in this. I wasn't expecting it, but now you will.
Fresh Hell is some sort of deconstruction of millennial life during "lockdown". The entire script works very hard to make sure you understand that these characters are millennials who are going through typical millennial struggles, just like you and I. They are relatable, you see. They all have one of the seven established millennial personality types - "underemployed", "horny", "gay/depressed", "black", "fascist sympathizer", "woke", and "feels old". You have to be at least one of these if you are a millennial. I myself am a combination of several, so it's great to have that representation in media. After each character is introduced, we transition to a decent second act that uses COVID to ask questions about how we know what we know. If we rely on our computers as windows to the world, how can we tell between facts and disinformation? Can we trust what we see? What are we even seeing? It's the same questions that epistemology has been tackling since before a single human language was written down, but this moment in history is uniquely suited to manipulation of the news, media, even the mind.
Unfortunately, the film doesn't do much with this. Instead, all pretenses are abandoned rather abruptly and we are subjected to one of the most boring third acts since that babbling architect in The Matrix: Revolutions. As tritely as it started, it ends. More of a whisper than a bang, the story concludes but only just so. Erratic presentation and talking about money gives the impression of something being said without actually addressing the reality of being a millennial, which I had assumed was the core theme of the film. In the end, I feel talked about rather than talked to.
It's horror, but not scary. It's comedy, but not funny. It's a movie, but not fun to watch. Perhaps it could survive as an artifact of our difficult times, but I'm not eager to get anyone watching it right now.
I hate this movie so much. I don't know if I've ever hated a movie quite like this. The characters are all absolutely unlikable gutter trash (except for the poor child) who all make the worst decisions. It's awful, confusing, boring, and generally unpleasant.
Hilariously transparent attempt at Christian proselytizing. Extremely goofy. Very fun. Watch with friends and alcohol.
This is a mood piece. The camera moves slowly (if it moves at all) and does not linger too long on any character. Noisy, low contrast, monochrome images make it extremely difficult to make out particulars. It's disorienting and confusing, with no real story to speak of. It is the horror of being young and alone in a world that's still so new, and it perfectly captures what I remember of being just such a child in the dark.
I won't recommend it. This will not resonate with most people. But it is a great movie nonetheless.
