I was not the only one sobbing in the theater.
Anyone who claims this film "lacks empathy", "leers and ogles in disgust", or is "fatphobic" is simply betraying their own lack of empathy.
Not sure what other people were expecting... I thought it was the perfect blend of humor, action, gore and even some heart.
At 93 minutes, it was a lot of fun and didn't drag at all.
Apparently, Adam Driver has now reached the Nic Cage stage of his career.
This movie was great because I fell asleep in the theater and had an amazing nap
Am I the only one who loved this movie?
Sure, it's not perfect. But it shoots for the moon and, in my opinion, mostly succeeds.
DRINK THE OOZE!
Pros:
- Excellent performances
- Delightfully weird. More goop than your average Marvel movie.
- Some of the most stunning visuals I have ever seen.
- The humor in this movie is so utterly stupid and absurd and I love it.
Cons:
- Dialogue which seems to have been written by a twelve year old
- An unnecessarily confusing plot
Personally, I think this is the best Marvel movie since No Way Home.
How many holes do you have?
Why does this feel like I'm watching one of Kamala's Captain Marvel fanfics
At times, this feels like Ridley Scott in top form, directing sweeping, epic historical battles. At times, it feels like an absurdist black comedy à la The Great. (My entire theater lost it at "You think you're so great because you have BOATS!") But most of the time, it feels like an entire season of television hopelessly compressed into 2.5 hours. As a result, I understood little and cared even less.
Maybe the 4-hour cut will be better, but I doubt it. The sheer number of things it touches on - characters, political maneuvers, relationships, battles - seems like it would take 10 hours to cover properly.
"Destiny has brought me here. Destiny has brought me this lamb chop!"
WE FINALLY GOT TO SEE NIC CAGE'S SUPERMAN FIGHT A GIANT SPIDER
Could the ugly, untalented gays please report to the principal's office?
Am I the only one who thought Halle Bailey was great but the movie was bad?
Halle Bailey's magnetic presence is about the only thing this movie has going for it. When she's singing, it's amazing! Aside from her, though, it's pretty bad.
Other thoughts:
> Why is so much of this movie so dark?
> A lot of the CGI looks pretty bad.
> The "Scuttlebutt" song was SO bad.
> I still don't care about Eric.
> And they cut out my favorite scene, where Sebastian is chased by the chef!
I'd recommend rewatching the original instead.
"It was all going fine until he chopped off all his fingers!"
Uneven, but gripping nonetheless.
Jake Gyllenhaal was fine. Dar Salim was amazing.
(In case it's driving you crazy too: Parker is Homelander. I had to look it up :joy:)
Shockingly good. WAY better than it has any right to be.
I really did NOT need to actually see Armond shitting...
It's called the Equalizer 3 because it contains about 3 minutes of equalizing
Obviously a very flawed film. That being said, it looks gorgeous and kept me interested all the way to the end - more than I can say for some other movies.
Now that that's out of the way, let's talk about all the plot points this movie never bothers to explain:
1. What was the plane crash?
2. Why did Gemma Chan kill Frank at the end?
3. Why did Margaret's child disappear?
4. What was happening when Alice got crushed up against the glass? And when she sees Margaret smash her head into the mirror? And what was with the empty eggs?
5. Can you imagine whatever you want in the world, like in Inception? Does Frank control the world?
6. What were all the earthquakes/rumbles?
7. Why did one guy tell his wife they were making weapons?
8. Olivia Wilde's character is there because she lost her children - that seemed like an interesting story which was not explored at all.
And on and on...
Me after 30 minutes: If Ari Aster's goal was to make me uncomfortable, he's certainly succeeding.
Me after 2.5 hours: I don't mind long movies, but this is exhausting.
Me after 3 hours: That penis monster was the worst thing I've ever seen.
Edit: After seeing that Ari Aster called this a "Jewish Lord of the Rings", I'm tempted to lower my rating. I don't think he understands Judaism or The Lord of the Rings. (Written as a Jew myself.)
Sure, Judaism is associated with neuroticism and guilt, and LOTR is an epic journey. But at the essence of each of them is hope -- something this movie completely lacks. Even when Beau finally confronts and kills his mother, there is no redemption -- he is once again destroyed by her.
"Everything I Own" by Bread is a great song, though. So at least there's that...
Dev Patel really said I'm gonna outdo the bathroom fight scene (MI:6) and the kitchen fight scene (Tenet) and the elevator fight scene (Winter Soldier) while also addressing social and political themes and call it "Monkey Man"
I really wanted to love this movie.
Visually, it's absolutely gorgeous! Unfortunately, the "friendship" which is supposed to be the emotional core of the movie rings completely hollow.
One of the two main characters is not a character at all. Lt. Hudner has literally zero characteristics (except not being racist), and the movie fails to make me care about him or even believe that he's a real person.
Why does he care about Jesse so much? Because he's black? Because Daisy asked him to in their one short conversation?
Such a disappointment. Not a terrible movie, but it could really have been great.
Mark Ruffalo is definitely the unexpected star of this movie.
Jennifer Coolidge is such a unique brand of low-energy crazy
Ryan Gosling should do more comedy.
Good episode, could've easily been 20 minutes shorter though. They're clearly stretching things out to fill a 10-hour season.
This movie messed me up.
Now I understand why people hate remakes.
Did Aquaman just reference Loki and Azkaban in the same sentence? Lol
Way better than I was expecting. Go in blind if you can.
Didn't quite understand all the twists and turns, but I'm looking forward to a second viewing.
Robert Rodriguez's Matrix/Inception? I'm here for it!
I've never seen a Hallmark movie, but I imagine this is what they're like.
