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Private Notes
It's Christmas Day and the usual festivities are underway. Compo becomes interested in a skateboard.
Foggy decides to beat the Christmas rush-in the middle of summer. He ends up being conned by Big Eric who sells him 100 Christmas trees for 10. A bargain? Not when they are crawling with insects!
Christmas isn't what it used to be, so the trio decide to look for two old school chums to help recapture the spirit of their youth.
Wanting to take a break from the comercial side of Christmas Foggy books a seaside caravan for himself, Compo and Clegg.
'The Funny Side of Christmas' is a Christmas special broadcast by BBC1 on 27 December 1982. Presented by Frank Muir, it comprised one comedy sketch each from 10 contemporaneous English comedy series: Butterflies, The Fall and Rise of Reginald Perrin, Last of the Summer Wine, The Les Dawson Show, Only Fools and Horses, Open All Hours, Smith and Jones, Sorry!, Three of a Kind, and Yes Minister.
After Sam's inconsiderate demise at the home of Lily-Bless-Her, our trio are faced with the task of explaining to his wife about his wet feet and fluffy suit.
Wesley has discovered an old racing car. Compo, Clegg and Foggy offer to help him transport it back to his shed, not reckoning on its condition.
The day of Barry and Glenda's wedding brings new gossip to town, and also introduces her uncle Seymour as the new third man of the group.
Seymour plans to put some magic back into Christmas and Santa back where he belongs-on the rooftops not on a bicycle.
It's the annual garden fete at Dream Acres, featuring Nora as VIP waitress and a tramp who has taken a special interest in one particular donkey.
Barry has a secret - he wants to get Glenda a water-bed for Christmas.
Compo is desperate to buy a present for Nora, and a visit to Auntie Wainwright's may provide the answer.
Is Barry taking the spirit of Christmas too far when he's found "sleeping it off" in the pub wearing a Santa suit?
The trio start a courier service. Wesley fails to keep clean.
Compo, Clegg and Foggy encounter a stranger from the Heckmondwike Extraterrestrial Club who foresees aliens landing in Yorkshire.
Wesley gets Foggy, Norman and Compo to help him move a Piano for Auntie Wainwright almost running into Billy Ingleton, who takes a shine to the instrument. Foggy wants credit as the concert promoter for Billy. Howard and Marina wear, what they think are, disguises. Eli conducts The Holme Band at the concert. Compo saves the show.
A depressed Howard tries to build himself up but, under Foggy's instruction, ends up breaking his leg. Auntie Wainwright has Smiler testing a Triumph Motorcycle, after she rents him the riding gear. Foggy intends to sneak Marina past Pearl and into Norman's house so that Howard can come over to see her. Meanwhile, the ladies morning coffee group plan to give Howard a surprise visit that same evening to cheer him up during his recovery.
All types of strange creatures seem to be parading themselves through town. The reason? A new film's being made. All the locals get involved on the production of the film. Pearl puts a secret electric device on Howard's bycicle, so she can track him down, when he escapes her.
Compo, Clegg and Truly chase a reluctant groom all through the village and beyond to stop him from escaping his wedding. Meanwhile, hungover best man Barry is frantically trying to locate the missing wedding ring.
Compo is selected to travel to France with a group of local WWII veterans, only to have the offer withdrawn when the organisers realize how scruffy he looks. The local ladies take pity on him and collect enough money for him to go, and Truly and Clegg join him for the trip. Meanwhile, Edie's long-estranged sister Ros shows up in town, ready to make amends with Edie and possibly settle down again. Edie, angry at her for leaving her husband and devastating their mother, isn't interested in reconnecting. In France, the trio has two goals: to release Billy Hardcastle's homing pigeon and to revisit a spot Compo and some of his fellow soldiers camped overnight after a gruelling escape from the Germans. There's just one snag: Compo doesn't remember where it is.
Tom intends to to give Howard a "going fishing" excuse. Truly, Clegg and Billy meet a polar explorer with a domineering wife. Marina and Auntie Wainwright tart-up the explorer's wife. Pearl and Glenda go hunting for fishermen.
When Nora Batty books Billy Ingleton's organ for a charity fair, she badly underestimates how much of an attraction it will be... Marina declines to go out with Howard because she's caught the showbiz bug, and is rehearsing a play at the local church. Howard asks the trio to help him think of something "showbizzy" they can do together.
A guide to 30 Years Of Last Of The Summer Wine, the 2003 BBC One TV documentary. A celebration of the world's longest-running comedy series.
Norman has been roped into performing a humorous monologue for the Christmas Concert. Pearl plans to force Howard to mime a recording of Nelson Eddy. Glenda plans to force Barry to perform as a magician. Billy wants to give an archery demonstration. Alvin is practicing as a one-man-band. Entwistle hypnotizes Smiler into knowing how to dance.
Feeling too old for a bicycle, Howard purchases a "secret" car. Barry is having a spiritual crisis.
Truly and Norman are drawn into Howard's latest escape plan. Auntie Wainwright dresses Smiler as Father Christmas and Tom as an elf. Glenda tries to help Barry get over a negative reflective mood. The local police think the men are a gang trying to dispose of a body.
Alvin has Truly and Norman over for a Holiday dinner. Glenda invited a man to dinner that Barry does not like. Pearl and Marina each give Howard a sweater vest, so he wears them both... at the same time. Auntie Wainwright gives Tom and Smiler a dinner that is actually nice, and then empties their pockets in a card game.
Luther 'Hobbo' Hobdyke, a retired milkman with strong links to MI5, arrives in the village. Very soon, calling upon his experiences on numerous dangerous missions overseas as a master spy, he forms a small team of reluctant volunteers, consisting of Alvin and Entwistle, ready to react to any emergency in the village. Finding that Hobbo has moved in next door, Clegg and Truly recall that he was never much of a milkman, but have to admit that his needlework is always exemplary.
Norman Clegg visits his late wife's grave on the anniversary of her death, then he reunites with his friends Compo Simmonite and Cyril Blamire and the trio wonders through town talking about, life, death and fish.
The trio pays a visit to the barbers where they talk about the war, marriage, local women, and the frequent rows that exist between couples. Then they go to the cafe, where the first (of many) arguments between Ivy and Sid takes place. Compo realizes he forgot his house key in the library and the trio wonders through town, in search for the librarian (Mr. Wainwright).
Clegg and Blamire try to convince Compo to step inside a church. Then they talk about the existence of God, miracles and the possibility of an afterlife.
The trio visits a stately home, but naturally have some problems with Compo's messy ways.
Spring's coming and Compo is once again suffering from spring fever, so he sets off to find the perfect companionship for him. He ends up hiring a female housekeeper, in search of new-found love.
Thinking they need a faster way to travel through the hills, Clegg convinces the others to buy a car. They end up with an old piece of metal that proves to be more trouble than it's worth.
With a new camera in hands, the trio spends the day trying to find interesting things to photograph.
After Clegg suffers a little incident with his bicycle it's up to the trio to find someone to mend it.
Gloria, a friend of Nora Batty is emigrating to Australia. It's up to the trio to find a piano for her surprise farewell party.
Thinking they have too much free time on their hands, the trio decides to find some kind of occupation. They come across a dodgy bankrupt dealer who persuades them to sell his new product, with disastrous results, particularly for Blamire.
When Wally Batty threatens to leave home, Compo sees it as a perfect opportunity to move in with Nora Batty, so he does everything possible to impress her, like cleaning his home and dressing smartly.
The trio tries to persuade a tight-fisted man to buy a round of drinks, for which they concoct a very peculiar plan.
The trio comes across a canoe, and it seems it's time for a little expedition up the river. Of course, with Blamire in charge they are soon likely to get wet.
Compo takes up motorcycling, much to the surprise of Blamire and Clegg.
Compo is bored. Since Cyril Blamire left for Oswestry, to live with a woman, things have been a bit too calm for him in town. But soon, Clegg brings the solution to all their boredom. A letter from Blamire asking them to welcome home an old fried of his, called Foggy Dewhurst, and help him cope with the sudden changes in his life, after he was more or less forced to retire. Compo and Clegg meet with the new "third man", the war hero Foggy Dewhurst, who because of his peculiar life and his endless wartime stories soon makes his presence noted around town. His military posture, and his "murderous" impulses only get him in a fight with Big Malcolm, and his military precision doesn't seem to be a great help, when the trio tries to carry Foggy's heavy wartime luggage up a hill.
Mr Wainwright is back in town, and quickly throws the trio out of the library. The trio goes back to the cafe, where Ivy is having the usual battle of wits with Sid. There they meet with Stuart, and old man who's having a strange click in his leg. Later the trio helps Sid to mend a whole in the roof of the cafe with the usual disastrous results. Meanwhile Wainwright dates the new female librarian.
The trio takes takes a little holiday in Scarborough, but what's the deal with Compo's cardboard box?
When the trio notices Compo's nephew Gordon is depressed, they come up with various ways of cheering him up.
When Foggy discovers his old golf clubs in the attic of his home, he takes Compo, Clegg and Sid for a little practice of "the noble sport".
It's Gordon's wedding day and, as always, problems are near. this time they appear with a face and a name: Big Malcolm. As always it's up to the trio to see that the wedding ends properly, but not without some incidents in between.
Foggy decides Compo and Clegg are not as fit as they should be. The path back to physical fitness is isometrics-or is it? Maybe... not.
When one of Compo's ferrets escapes and takes residence in Nora's house, it's up to Wally Batty to get it back safely.
Sid's plan to install a new bell for the cafe door is doomed from the moment he asks for the help of the trio.
Keen to celebrate the Silver Jubilee, Foggy decides the trio should have their own float.
Some people talk to trees, but Clegg is serenading flowers in the cafe...
Foggy visits a lady friend in Wales, but trouble is soon at the door when Compo and Clegg go after him.
The British vegetable is in deterioration due to a lack of good honest "muck" - where can the trio get hold of good fresh vegetables?
Nora's brother is near to death and not likely to see another Christmas. So Foggy decides to re-create an old-fashioned Christmas-in the middle of a sweltering hot summer.
When "laugh a minute" Amos Hames, who toured Europe during the 1940's returns to town after many years, suspicions arise about the reason for his return.
Foggy takes Compo and Clegg on a nostalgic trip to the Keighley and Worth Valley Railway.
Foggy has a vision to put a flag in a prominent place on the great British landscape - but first he needs a flag and a flagpole.
Foggy collects his flag and achieves his vision. His dream is achieved.
When Sid and Wally are seen disappearing into the woods, their wives wonder what they're up to.
Anyone criticising Yorkshire is rousing old Yorkshire ghosts - Clegg for one is very superstitious, so he doesn't want to wake up old ghosts.
Compo contemplates the sport of hang-gliding. Nora gets Wally to take her out for a meal.
Compo gets his hang-glider-courtesy of Wally Batty.
After a close encounter with an emergency, Foggy decides to go into the rescue business, all in the service of humanity, of course.
Compo enters a car race to impress Nora. Will Wesley's old banger ever start?
Foggy's latest scheme to earn some money appears when he discovers that there's good money to be made by walking other people's pets around town.
Foggy convinces his companions to design a bicycle that fits each of their personalities.
Compo wants to take a photo. Problem is... he wants it taken in Nora Batty's bedroom.
When Clegg buys a metal detector, it's off to the hills to look for treasure.
Compo buys a wet suit from Sid and decides to take up water skiing.
Compo convinces a barmaid that Foggy is an eccentric millionaire.
Wally is fed up with Nora's constant nagging so Compo, Clegg and Foggy devise a plan to get him out of the house for a few hours.
Foggy finds there's money to be made selling food to the desperate inhabitants of a local health farm.
Ludovic has bought a new van and to cheer him up Clegg is given the job of test driving it.
The trio volunteer at a church concert party.
Trying to camouflage himself, Foggy upsets a group of cyclists. Compo also upsets someone over the state of his trousers
Foggy says Nora has big feet, thus upsetting Compo, so they set out to find out whether it is true or not.
A discarded mattress sets Foggy on a campaign to clean up the countryside.
Compo turns into daredevil motorcycle rider "The Phantom" to prove to Nora that he is brave.
The trio set about the near impossible task of catching a stubborn donkey.
Compo enters the local marathon in order to impress Nora.
Ivy has to leave the cafe for the afternoon. Can she leave it in the capable hands of Foggy Dewhirst?
Clegg has to deliver a note to Marina in the supermarket. Can Seymour invent something highly original to justify all the security?
A rotting old boat is made to float... sometimes most unsuccessfully.
Why has Compo just thrown something of great sentimental value into Seymour's pond?
After Compo claims that any man who uses a purse is effeminate, Seymour tries to invent a strictly masculine purse.
Will Seymour's car safety device really make him rich and famous? His "guinea pig" may not agree.
Remember when you could buy ice cream from the man on the tricycle? This episode will refresh your memories for sure.
The trio devise a plan to "spring" Howard and Wally for a few hours of freedom.
It's rather difficult selling tickets for the church's Beatrix Potter evening - until someone comes up with an idea to set Compo scurrying.
Seymour insists Edie must be up to date with his latest design in waste disposal.
Edie learns to drive, so obvious disaster is expected.
How can Seymour harness the power of the wind for the benefit of mankind? Once again, Compo is the test pilot.
Old chum Bill Henry dies in America, which prompts Clegg to take Compo and Seymour on a sentimental journey.
Compo wonders why all the blood rushes to his head when he's turned upside down. Seymour sets out to discover why.
Is the piece of silver fished out of the canal really a thief's haul? Is there more where it came from?
Compo's feet hurt - but why go to visit "The Witch" for a cure?
A visit by a much-loved pet seems the only way to bring a smile to Clem's face during a spell in hospital.
Seymour tries to prove that skiing is more than just a winter sport for the rich.
The trio attend a funeral.
Is Jack Harry's cumbersome caravan wrecking his marriage? Seymour seems to think so, so he drags in Compo and Clegg to lend a hand.
Clegg could be the answer to a lonely widow's prayer! Meanwhile, who is kissing who?
The trio examines a haystack, resulting in their having to push it back to the top of a hill.
Compo is concerned when he sees Nora going out mysteriously and then sees her in the pub with another man.
The overly domesticated Gough is a woeful sight to behold at his anniversary party, so the guys take him out for a bit of cavorting.
No sooner than Seymour spots a kite does the trio end up building and attempting to fly their own gigantic version.
Compo wants to help Nora Batty with a troublesome chore, but Seymour ends up taking over and fouling up the entire operation. Howard tests out a series of lame disguises.
Seymour leaves to look after a school. Will life be boring for Compo and Clegg? Not for long, as Foggy Dewhirst returns to the fold.
Foggy has an idea to use portable radios to improve communications.
When Foggy hears about an athletic charity drive, he enters Compo and Clegg despite their wishes. An "injured" Howard drops out of the race and stops to recover in this young lady's refreshment stand. How refreshed can one man get?
Foggy is upset because he's not famous for anything, so he invents the sport of bicycle polo.
Our trio helps Captain Zero when his vehicle breaks down, but don't reckon on him getting drunk.
Ivy lets Foggy fix her toaster, and it goes to his flippin' head. Now he thinks he can restore the tatty sunken boat he's found at the bottom of the lake. He actually accomplishes even this, so Compo decides he must get Nora Batty into the boat alone with him. But surely Nora knows better - she'll have to be tricked.
After a heated encounter with two motorists, Foggy decides there must be money to be made providing parking spaces.
To stop Nora taking him for granted, Compo becomes a TV star for the day doing his legendary impression.
Having learned absolutely nothing from "The Charity Balls" just a few episodes back, Foggy tries to assert the boys' athletic prowess yet again, this time in a downhill barrel-rolling competition.
Compo is more than a little concerned when Smiler moves in as Nora Batty's lodger.
Compo is depressed because Nora has a lodger. Foggy has an unusual way of curing his malaise-dancing!
Foggy's idea is the ultimate in chairlifts to get people to the top of the hills without any effort.
Compo can't get over his suspicion of Nora's new lodger, Smiler. When he thinks he hears Nora singing a happy tune, he nearly goes to pieces. The trio tracks them around town, with Compo agonizing all the way. Meanwhile, Edie wants to go shopping at Huddersfield, but Wesley just wants to tinker with engines. Who do you suppose gets to have their way?
Compo needs money, so he tries to collect on a fifty-year-old debt from a school chum.
Howard needs Clegg's help to get an earring belonging to Marina out of the house without Pearl knowing.
Foggy gets Compo to take up pole vaulting so he can reach Nora's clothes post and impress her with his athletic prowess.
Is Ernie Burniston's fitness all a bluff? To prove it, Foggy uses Compo as his "guinea pig."
After overhearing a conversation between Nora and a neighbour, Compo discovers that Nora has a weakness for men in riding gear.
Compo, Clegg and Foggy prepare to pay their respects to an old teacher, but why is Howard so keen to go?
Wesley's weird new invention might score Compo some presentation points when he gives Nora some flowers.
Are Foggy's war stories true? Compo and Clegg decide to submit him to an old school ritual to discover the truth.
Clegg is the unwilling guardian of a giant stuffed panda bear, Marina's birthday present to Howard that must be delivered without Pearl catching on.
Compo is broke again so to earn some easy money, he visits Auntie Wainwright and becomes a one-man band.
When Foggy buys a video camera from Auntie Wainwright, it seems no-one is safe from his prying eye - especially Howard and Marina.
When Auntie Wainwright forces a gigantic tractor wheel on the trio, Foggy decides to make the best of it by crafting a vehicle out of it.
Foggy is left in charge of arranging the local gala. All goes well until he accidentally punctures the bouncy castle!
Now Foggy's on about Compo and Clegg being out of shape again, and he ends up putting them through an exhaustive training course that leaves them trapped inside sewer pipes. Howard's latest subterfuge has him publicizing the bicycle race he and Marina are "participating" in, but he does it a little too well this time.
The trio gets a gas grill from Auntie Wainwright, but its alarming potency brings an explosive touch to their barbeque. Howard is busy making improvements on his love-nest. Will it enflame Marina's passions, or just enflame Marina? And how did Howard end up with a wooden leg?
Too much home brew at a funeral tea leaves Compo and Foggy having to rescue Clegg from the arms of an amorous widow.
Smiler is selling security lights. Howard is determined to buy Marina a china shepherdess - if he can persuade Clegg to visit Auntie Wainwright's.
The trio finds they are involved in yet another of Howard's schemes to get a present to Marina - this time a cast iron bath!
Smiler is sick of living in misery with Nora Batty and will hand over 50 quid to anyone who will help him move out and live in misery someplace else. Foggy has a plan to get Smiler thrown out, but will Compo murder Smiler before they can put it into action?
Foggy comes up with the crazy idea of bicycle safety underwear after he collides with Compo riding his old bike.
Dewhirst's Nature Tours are launched by Foggy after he believes he's discovered the nesting place of a giant woodpecker.
After seeing a man on a sailboard, Foggy has the idea of inventing a three-man version.
Foggy grows dafter and is lately only interested in standing in a pit at a construction site because it reminds him of a foxhole in the war. Compo and Clegg get roped into his plans to recreate a battle scene. Are they headed for triumph, or is Triumph headed for them?
In the pub, the trio run across a scruffy old man looking for the wilderness. Foggy tries to avoid him, certain he's looking for a handout, but a curious Compo and Clegg learn it's just the opposite... he wants to abandon all his worldly possessions! They quickly take him up on the offer, not realizing that among those possessions is the man's wife. Their horror mounts as she follows them wordlessly around town.
Howard, proving that idiots aren't necessarily bereft of imagination in extreme circumstances, invents a local pest called a "stoneworm" in one of his lamest efforts yet to fool Pearl. But wonders will never cease - soon people all around town are wondering if their homes are infested.
Compo briefly casts Nora aside for a biker. But is he ready to cast aside his ragged trousers for a pair of leather chaps? Meanwhile, Clegg thinks he might just have escaped the clutches of Auntie Wainwright... but she turns up in the most unexpected places.
Well, the trio was about due for a run-in with another village idiot. The latest one tumbles down hills in a trashbin. He wants to become an astronaut - the trio just gets him drunk instead.
After seeing Howard fail in his attempts at hypnotism, Foggy becomes convinced he's a master at the art. But his attempts to practice on strangers backfire totally.
Foggy's become interested in his lineage and is positive he's related to the Dewhirsts living on a big estate nearby. Compo spots Nora eyeing some hats in a shop window and concludes that a hat is his ticket to winning Nora's heart. Foggy offers to help buy one if Compo assists him in his scheme to make a good impression on the Dewhirsts of Ogleby Hall. Also in this plot-heavy episode, Marina is looking for love with a taller man, but a note declaring her intentions gets misrouted.
Compo's inexpert attempt at constructing a homemade trampoline sets off a series of unfortunate mishaps.
This time's for real! Howard's had enough of Pearl and decides to leave home forever. It's up to the trio to get the couple back together, when it's visible that Howard misses Pearl more than he thought he would.
Foggy thinks the trio should be more in touch with the wilderness, so he thinks of the ideal plan, counting with Auntie Wainwright's bicycle bonanza, a map, and a basket of sandwiches.
Marina leaves Howard for good this time. He suspects that she has been seeing another man, and asks for the help of the trio to get her back. Foggy feels that what Howard needs is a bit of "the glamour of the uniform". Auntie Wainwright's new established costume department might be just the perfect place to find it.
When Pearl starts getting suspicious of Howard's affair once again, she locks his bicycle. It's now up to the trio to come up with a secret bicycle for Howard, which turns out to be a little more secret than they'd have thought.
When word comes around that there's a treasure buried in town, it's up to the trio to go and find it. To do so they need the help of the one man that has the *only* map, Lieutenant Commander Willoughby (Royal Navy, retired). It's up to Foggy to pay the 30 pounds the map's worth. The problem is... how many maps were sold in the first place? Foggy vows not to be near one cash dispenser again...
When Compo reaches a crucial point in his "relationship" with Nora Batty, and realises he's not going anywhere with her, he decides to go looking for his old "girlfriends" from his school days, with whom he expects to get a more "personal" relationship. It turns out he wasn't really ready for some of the surprises he encounters after all these years... people DO change sometimes.
The trio comes across a very weird scientist and his unusual new invention. Meanwhile Wesley's new suit causes some trouble during the ladies outing.
The trio encounters a man, and his inflatable doll, which creates some natural curiosity among the three elders.
When Wesley starts acting very weird about some new invention he has in his shed, the trio tries to find out what kind of invention is he working on.
When a local man "takes advantage" of Nora Batty, Compo challenges him to a duel.
The trio comes across a mobile lonely hearts agency. This time it seems it's the owners of the agency who need a bit of marital advice. Smiler tries to get rid of a tandem Auntie Wainright sold him. He ends up being the perfect client for the lonely hearts agency.
Howard's fears that there may be a spider hiding in his cap affects his relationship with Marina. A lucky wedding chimney sweep is down on his luck and depressed. Foggy insists on being his manager. Norman and Compo follow along to watch.
Ivy's getting some love letters from a mysterious man that calls himself C. W Northrop. The trio wants to know who this person really is, and end up having a little surprise.
When Pearl's "security" at home becomes too much for Howard to handle and Pearl starts suspecting his furtive encounters with Marina, the trio tries to find a double for Howard, so Pearl can see them together, and think she was mistaken all these years regarding Howard's secret love.
The trio tries to make Smiler become more aggressive, so he can stand up to Auntie Wainwright, but they end up getting a little more than they asked for.
The trio gets lost in the woods with Mr Davenport, a man in search of wisdom.
Glenda forces Barry to ask Wesley to "listen" to the car engine. Foggy, Norman and Compo meet a man who is obsessed with an end of the world prophecy. Auntie Wainwright send Smiler out to stalk a customer that escaped her shop without purchasing anything.
Compo bets Foggy he can get Nora Batty to kiss him before sunset. Will he manage to win the bet?
When a primate is said to be loose in the local woods, Foggy organises a search party, accompanied of course with the right uniform and military discipline.
Remembering Nora used to enjoy a ride on a motorbike and sidecar when her husband was alive, Compo hires a motorbike from Auntie Wainwright, and invites Nora for a ride. Wesley tries to fix Barry's car (again), with disastrous results.
Clegg, Compo and Truly bump into an old school mate, who now has a miserable and peaceful life. Compo's afraid to become like him, so he tries to think of ways to improve the trio's daily routine. The trio ends up rolling down a hill, as they did when they were children, but their age proves to speak louder than their will for adventure.
The trio ends up rolling down a hill, instead of walking down it, as they did when they were children, but their age proves to speak louder than their will for adventure. Barry's is asked by Howard to deliver a message to Marina. Not wanting to take this responsibility Barry asks Eli to deliver it. He gets the women mixed up, and Howard ends up meeting a "big" woman. Nora Batty's asked to walk on Compo's spine, as a way to mend his ailing back.
Compo wants to buy a present for Nora but has no money. Auntie Wainwright search Compo's house for something of value to swap for the gift. Truly misses his life as a police officer, and regrets not being recognized for something heroic during his police force service. He and Clegg wonder through town in search of an accident waiting to happen, so he can prevent it, and be regarded a local hero - he even calls the local paper. However it's not HIS face who ends up on the front page.
Wesley's new creation, a bed on wheels, causes great success. Particularly with Compo, who wants to be the first one to try it, providing he can find the right partner. This time he DOES end up in bed with Nora... for a while anyway.
Glenda gives one of Barry's old suits to the jumble sale, because she thinks it attracts blondes. Compo ends up buying the suit, with money from Truly and Clegg, and he DOES end up being chased by a blonde. Compo gives Nora Batty her last chance. When she turns him down, he starts searching for other women he dated when he was young, hoping to find the right one to marry him.
Barry buys a new saxophone from Auntie Wainwright. Glenda doesn't let him play indoors, so he has to find a spot outside to practice. The problem starts when Barry discovers in what type of case the saxophone comes in. Compo and an old local man start a competition to see which one of them is in better shape. The challenges include finding out who can climb a tree faster (problem is climbing down again), and who can go downhill faster, using Wesley's new invention.
When the local ladies start to gain some interest for a man named Walter Ridley, it's up for the trio to try and find out why he's so highly regarded by all the local women.
Howard buys a new van, as part of his new scheme to be left in peace with Marina. He even buys some furniture to put on the back of the van, to make it "a little more comfortable". Unfortunately the engine is not up to the test of those hills, and they end up coming down faster than they went up. Truly and Clegg spend the day dealing with a problem regarding Clegg's taxes.
An old sweetheart of Truly is back in town, after many years living abroad. He spends the day preparing for their reunion, but he certainly takes more than he expected when he sees former Audrey Nash, now known as "the Widow Dilhooley".
Nora Batty gets a postcard from a Gladwin in the Canary Islands. Compo's jealous, and tries to find something to win her heart back. First he tries to sing, but receives a wet response. Then he finds an airman uniform in Auntie Wainwright's shop, and tries his luck at skydiving, with disastrous results. Howard enlists Truly's help in yet another scheme to fool Pearl about his outdoor activities. He asks him to tell Pearl he's his security advisor. Wesley has a new invention, and he asks Barry to be the one to test it.
When Compo decides to take up horseriding lessons to impress Nora Batty, it's up to Clegg and Truly to help him. For that they buy Auntie Wainwright's wooden horse. The problems start when its wheels prove to be too much of a ride.
The trio comes across a man dressed as Robin Hood. Compo knows that Nora has a birth mark on one of her knees, but can't remember on which one, so he thinks of a way discover it.
Howard's having some trouble regarding his love life with Marina. And this time is serious, she's thrown away her Tom Cruise photos. It's up to the trio to find a way to get the pair back together. They come up with a plan involving a very ugly blonde woman...
Truly tries to help Barry become more confident, but things turn nasty leading to some damage to Barry's nose.
Smiler injures his foot while selling door to door for Auntie Wainwright. The trio tries to assist him in recovering from his injury, with disastrous results.
Compo, Clegg, Truly and Wesley meet a man with an earthquake detector and Barry spends the episode with his arm in a sling.
Compo tries to resurrect the ancient art of Thumpy Dub. Auntie Wainwright sells Truly a broken lawn mower. Marina buys two vanilla slices from Ivy in the cafe, but who is the other one for? Glenda is relieved when Barry prefers an éclair, but Pearl isn't so happy when Howard has vanilla slice crumbs around his mouth.
Howard is suspicious when Pearl suddenly starts looking glamorous and very happy. He is so concerned he sends Compo to meet Marina to tell her he can't make it for their rendezvous and then recruits Clegg, Truly and Wesley to follow Pearl with him to see what she is up to. Meanwhile Barry goes missing after leaving for a jog, Glenda recruits Edie, Ivy, and Nora to help look for him unaware that Auntie Wainwright has recruited him to help her and Smiler collect some furniture.
Compo, Clegg and Truly meet a man who wants to solve the mystery of the phantom number 14 bus. Meanwhile Smiler has to deliver some furniture to the notorious Cooper Street. Pearl makes Howard sell off his collection of glue and Compo also ponders that great question... has Nora Batty got a tattoo?
Clegg tackles his ironing and ends up ironing for Howard too after he falls into a river. Smiler gets tiddly on two very small glasses of Auntie Wainwright's home-made wine and Barry takes up dog walking and ends up with a kiss from Marina and a telling off from Glenda.
Truly tries to fix Clegg's Vacum Cleaner. Compo and Howard get into a fight with a big man. Barry gets in trouble, because he's "caught" by Marina, as she kisses him, and leaves traces of her lipstick on his mouth. In order to explain this to Glenda he enlists the help of the trio, and they start spreading the rumour that the kisses are for "charity purposes". Auntie Wainwright sells a motorbike to two policemen.
Howard has a wig delivered to Clegg's, but when Pearl is suspicious Clegg has to not only pretend ownership of it, but be seen wearing it, much to Truly's amusement. Howard is only persuaded to reclaim the wig after the trio arrange for Smiler to wear it and Marina to kiss him. Meanwhile Barry tries and fails to be master of his own home, and Compo offers himself to Nora Batty as a "limited sale".
Our trio helps a middle-aged couple get their old car out of a field, but the wife insists she's recieving ancient telepathic messages through its hubcap. Or is she making it up as an excuse to chase after a certain younger gentleman? Meanwhile, Auntie Wainwright is trying to vanquish her demons by splurging on Ivy's most expensive cream cake.
After seeing Nora Batty dressed in a "sexy" outfit, Compo's heart doesn't live up to the excitement. He dies a happy man! His friends show him their respects, and 200 pairs of white overalls provide an ideal goodbye to Compo...
Clegg, Truly and Barry spend the day trying to find someone to take care of Compo's ferrets. They end up finding the ideal person for the task, also uncovering a secret that Compo kept for quite some time.
It's Compo's funeral day, and all his friends come to pay their last respects to the "little scruffy one". Even Auntie Wainwright closes the shop to attend his funeral.
Compo recieves a personal letter after all these years. When Clegg and Truly open it they discover Compo's biggest secret: he has a son. The son, Tom, wrote to Compo, because after all the years of separation he hoped he and his father could get together. When Tom arrives in town it's up for the pair of them to give him the shocking news.
Clegg, Truly and Wesley help Tom find a new exhaust for his van. Howard discovers the simple pleasures, by having breakfast on the terrace. The ladies meet an addition to their tea party.
Tom and Barry attempt to turn a reluctant Babs into a showbiz star.
Glenda buys Barry a white suit to go on a picnic but he ends up with Clegg, Truly and Wesley at the station collecting an organ for Tom. Howard buys some platform shoes from Auntie Wainwright to make him taller.
In this episode, Tom carries a fake dog around and attempts to be like his father, Compo and climb a tree as persuaded by Clegg and Truly. Also, Tom is keeping some of his personal property at Barry's house, including a goat that Glenda does not approve of when she sees it in the garage. A repo man is trying to find Tom.
Howard has lost his boxer shorts and Pearl is upset at him. But it turns out she hid them from him just to keep him on his toes. Barry wants to become thin and Tom and Mrs. Avery help him out by being his personal fitness trainers. The trio help Howard figure out a way to prove to Pearl that he's found his shorts.
Howard is filled with cheer because Pearl, Ivy, Roz, Glenda, Nora and the girls are going on a nice outdoor picnic. He has his chance with Marina alone - finally! But his plan backfires because he pushes Marina off the wall they were eating on when he sees the bus Pearl is riding on. Meanwhile, Petal drives the bus and can't get her left and right worked out correctly. Meanwhile the Clegg, Truly, Billy, Tom and Smiler test out an off-road bike and Barry goes out golfing and is sick of Glenda ringing him on his cellphone, which bothers the captain of the golf course.
Wesley has a "go anywhere" coffee vending machine, which is successful at first, but after trying it at the ladies' Jumble Sale and the Golf Course it finally blows up, which is a huge embarrassment for Barry, who is trying to be on the captain's good side, like Petal said after she gave him a palm reading. Before, Glenda rang Barry right when the golf captain was about to make a shot, which made him angry.
First, Auntie Wainwright takes a half hour break from the shop, leaving Smiler in charge, and is impatient for the half hour to be over so she can go back to work. Smiler gets very upset of her calling him every five minutes! Pearl thinks Howard is a bit overactive and cheerful so she fixes him a big supper to slow him down, but that doesn't stop him from seeing Marina! Barry wants a new suit to look more of an "executive type person" but Glenda refuses him to buy it. He buys it anyway and goes along with the trio and Tom around town, testing the suit out, and everyone thinks Barry has gone to a funeral! After yelling at him, Glenda thinks that she was too harsh on him and sets out with Wesley and Edie looking for him. Petal and Tom start Ace Carpeting, for which the van is in very poor shape, so they get Wesley to fix it.
Howard buys a gnome for Marina and tries to keep it from Pearl. The trio helps him take it away. Smiler ends up taking it and Marina gets attracted to him, and then to other people who own the exact same gnome!
Pearl finds a blonde hair and assumes it's Howard seeing another woman. Pearl wants to go to the coast to be loved but Howard and Marina work it out.
Tom receives a solicitor's letter, which says he has received a big screen television set, which he ends up giving to Eli, and Barry takes up flying, which is just a model airplane. Also, Howard wants Norman to play Tennis so he can play Tennis with Marina, who gets sick of it and then ends up flying with Barry.
Barry needs to collect overdue insurance from someone he has never met, so Clegg, Truly, and Billy help him stand up (at an angle) and be brave and make a call to his house with confidence. He's at an angle because the trio got Barry drunk.
To generate some excitement in the village, Truly stops a common citizen (who happens to be Billy Ingleton, the man who almost knew Pavarotti) in a car and warns him about "The Tiger". Billy gets worried and gets pulled over again. The rumour spreads across town and Howard buys things from Auntie Wainwright to protect him and Marina against the tiger.
When Barry has a mid-life crisis and becomes interested in fast cars, Glenda worries that she will not be exciting enough for him.
When Howard's bicycle starts squeaking around Pearl, he worries that it is some kind of curse. He decides to get the bicycle exorcised by a local expert - Norman Clegg...
Billy is being followed by a fan as a result of - after having one too many in the pub - bragging that himself, Clegg and Truly are the three surviving descendants of Robin Hood's men. Howard, meanwhile, is concerned that Pearl doesn't love him any more - she only gave him one fried tomato for breakfast!
Clegg is dismayed when Howard leaves with him a "picnic accessory" which he plans to collect later - Marina! He will only collect her when Pearl is safely away, but that could be some time, as the ladies are coming to tea next door. Auntie Wainwright's advertising dummy becomes key in the plan as Truly and Billy help Clegg get free of the imposed house guest.
Wesley and Barry come up with a winning idea to sell hot dogs to tourists from Wesley's new wheelbarrow. Meanwhile, Clegg, Truly and Tom turn their thoughts to Nora Batty's life in Australia and remember Compo.
An unhappy Smiler is cheered by one of Wesley's inventions, a trolley. All that is needed is a hill and some driving skills...
One of Glenda's unwanted anniversary presents proves to be useful in strange ways, especially as Howard becomes trapped in his own bathroom...
Tom fancies emulating the achievements of his father, and asks Clegg and Truly for stories of what Compo could do on his bicycle...
When Billy's brother Bradley arrives on the scene, not even Clegg and Truly can bring a smile to his dour face. Meanwhile, an inflatable feeding trough poses logistical nightmares for Wesley and Auntie Wainwright...
When a man needs to be alone with his thoughts, help is on hand to provide the right atmosphere - but noone counts on him becoming the 'Wise Man Of The Woods'...
Alvin the Birdman crashes from the skies into the lives of Truly, Clegg and Billy. He thinks he has landed in France, and has thus broken the long-distance hang-gliding record. After breaking the news about the failure of his flight, the wily trio desperately try to find something that he can be first at. Rumours of a mystery cat creature lurking in the nearby woods gives them the perfect opportunity. Can Alvin turn stalker to identify the beast?
Whilst out walking, Clegg and Truly meet a Chinese handyman full of wisdom for a price - Entwistle from Hull. Also, Tom gets visited by the repo-man.
After helping Entwistle to repair his broken-down truck, Truly, Clegg and Billy find their skills are in demand again - to help Tom and Smiler find the source of a squeak on their handcart.
In order to avoid any fuss, Clegg spends his birthday having a quiet meal in a nice small hotel - but as usual things don't work out as he might want them to...
When the gang witness a old friend skiing on the roof of a van, they become attached to the idea...
Old Goff Helliwell is due to die soon, so Clegg, Truly and the others look for something that will give him a reason to carry on...
Barry is looking for another hobby besides golf, and Billy decides to interest him in archery...
Howard gets a present from Marina - a lifesize fake gorilla. The question is how to get it home?
Tom and Smiler arrange an interesting blind date and Truly discovers his ex-wife's new husband is coming to town.
Cupid's arrow targets Truly when a blast from his past returns with amorous intentions.
Barry must dispose of a prize he's won; Truly plots to fob it off on Howard, who has forgotten an important birthday and needs a present quickly. Glenda doubts Miss Davenport's claims of seeing a large dinosaur in their neighborhood. Alvin takes up propecting for gold in the river.
Nora is to appear in a parade as the wife of a local hero. The hero himself is to be portrayed by a life-sized dummy, which has been at Auntie Wainwright's for cleaning. Can The General get back in one piece?
A distressed woman sends Truly and Billy in search of a Lionel. Barry and Glenda meet a worried man on a sightseeing trip. Could he benefit from a visit to the Seer of Hull? And why exactly does Alvin want a photograph of Nora?
Billy's new green suit has nothing to do with Ireland. Entwistle takes meter reading to a new level. The sight of Marina in a wedding dress shocks Howard into buying Auntie Wainwright's "Adventure Pack".
Clegg, Truly, and Billy discover Barry in the woods. He's obviously guilty of something - but what? Meanwhile a strange man is seen near Barry and Glenda's house while Barry is away. Alvin tries welding as a way of sprucing up the yard. Miss Davenport has a less-than-romantic entanglement.
Nora Batty is recruiting for charity, which in this case is giving a day out to an older rural family. But who exactly is "the Lad" and why is he carrying an apple? Meanwhile, Barry considers making a charity appearance in Western gear.
Alvin buys equipment to listen for sounds from space, but Howard's the one hearing disembodied voices. Billy goes for a spin. Barry struggles with his role in a dramatic group. At last, there's a woman who's attracted to Smiler - unfortunately for him.
Barry is chagrined that a lonely stranger he met on holiday has taken up his offer of hospitality. It doesn't help that the stranger's hobby is trying to attract birds with a penny-whistle. Auntie Wainwright offers a special on periscopes. Alvin bites off more lino than he can chew.
Truly, Alvin, and Billy try to mend some fences between Nora and her one-time friend, Audrey Craig. Glenda gives Barry a gift to restore his confidence: a golf caddy. Is there really a dragon inhabiting the hills?
Someone keeps calling Truly's new cell phone; Truly worries it might be The Former Mrs. Truelove calling to announce a visit. But she wouldn't do that... would she?
Lennie from the pickle factory, who has visions of sailing the canals in a swan boat, unwisely allows Clegg, Truly, Alvin and Billy to help him on his way. But a passing narrowboat puts paid to his dream.
Clegg climbs an old tree to prove that the town clock from a nearby village can be seen from its height. scared of heights, Truly, Alvin, Billy and Howard have to get him down.
Nora Batty finds herself the target of a notorious womaniser after she garners his attention with her baked goods.
Smiler is more miserable than usual. He's pining for Hermione, a woman he met the night before.
Smiler pretends to be an intellectual in an attempt to enchant Marina. Howard, a simple thinker, wants to keep an eye on them at the poetry group without being seen so, foolishly, he goes along with Truly's idea.
After Clegg ends up with his foot in a plaster and an arm in a sling after a bike trip with Billy & Alvin, Truly and the Boys try to invent a bike that also an ATV. Barry gets bit by the camping bug.
Smiler regrets never having taken up the offer from Mavis McDonagh to look her up sometime. Truly, Alvin and Billy go on the trail to track her down. With the help Nora and Ivy, they find out that the woman had lived in Jamieson Street, now renamed Pepworth Street. So they go knocking on doors.
Clegg is trying to remember the name of a particularly obnoxious superior of his, from his days working in the Co-op.
Overcome by the smell of a real bargain, Auntie Wainwright has made a successful bid at the auction rooms.
Truly leads the enquiries into the whereabouts of a Co-op Manager who was a tyrant when Clegg worked there.
Glenda decides that Barry would suit a hat, Smiler finds a suit of armour in the shop storeroom, Cleggs cousin turns up and Clegg, Truly, Billy, Alvin and Entwistle follow a bottle with a message in it. Marina and Miss Davenport compare notes on their love lives. Nelly joins the ladies for coffee at the cafe.
Clegg's overbearing cousin Aubrey comes to stay, he challenges Alvin and Billy to a bike riding competition. Auntie Wainwright employs Smiler and Tom as shop dummies. Nora Batty goes blonde.
Howard is on 24-hr "lock down" by Pearl, so his friends accept the challenge to help him escape. Barry thinks he's missing out on something because he feels contented with his life; Entwistle has too much fun with his dog.
Billy takes Clegg, Truly, Alvin and Entwistle into the green wood for a barby. Pearl chains Howard to the house and Miss Davenport tries to get the ladies to discuss romantic novels.
Miss Davenport teases Barry making him think she has the hots for him. Alvin is seen by Nora with a tall, mysterious blonde.
Billy gets a new merry man to join his band..unfortunately it's a merry woman!..Howard wants people to think he is having flying lessons, so Auntie Wainwright kits him out in the right gear..circa 1925!
Clegg, Truly and Billy meet up again with Lenny, the former Swan Man of Ilkley, he has heard voices from above so the lads help him in his quest to be a prophet. The two policemen see a mysterious leg, they follow it and it belongs to Howard. Miss Davenport continues her teasing of Barry.
Howard gets to look after a friend's dog for the day. Glenda and Barry get dressed up as Cleopatra and an Egyptian Mummy to go to a fancy dress party. Auntie Wainwright upgrades Tom and Smilers transport..to a tandem!
Auntie Wainwright supplies Tom and Smiler with new transport.....but is it suitable?
An old friend, Doggy, is almost 80 and getting married again - so The Boys take him out for his bachelors party complete with arranged special lady ... But what starts out as a boring dry affair soon gets pronounced as "better than my first stag" by the groom.
What starts out as a good joke on Howard gets a life of its own when Truly invents a ghost story that involves a local wooden area.
Howard feels he has out grown the bicycle so he purchases a car from a woman who says it reminds her too much of her late-husband.
Howard decides it's time to take Pearl out for a dinner to the "Fox and Duck" - so Pearl invites Nelly to come with, and Truly invites Marina to go with, now if only Howard knew about it.
Science-fiction addict Kevin believes aliens from outer space may have landed. Truly, Clegg and Alvin help to convince him he is right.
Howard has purchased a track bike and is desperate to hide it from Pearl.
Alvin and Truly tie one on in a bar and Alvin volunteers to complete the Crowcroft Challenge - a task that has never been completed. Howard volunteers when he realizes that he might be able to get together with Marina during the Challenge.
Tom decides that Smiler should answer an ad looking for a dance partner so Truly and gang decide to turn him into "Fred Astaire"; Barry has Glenda help him find the mysterious squeak in his car.
Pearl, Miss Davenport, Nora Batty, Nelly, Ivy, and Glenda have entered a baking contest. Howard runs into an old flame while out with Truly, so he takes it upon himself to help the two get back together.
While standing on a hillside admiring the view, Alvin, Truly, and Entwistle get stoned by a stranger. Smiler does some witchcraft. Pearl & Nelly track Howard.
Barry is tired of being outperformed in fitness by his physically fit neighbour, so his friends decide to help him out.
Howard disguises himself like a racer to escape Pearl's watchful eye but discovers disguises have effects he didn't bargain for when Aunty Wainwright mistakes him for Tom.
Policemen Cooper and Walsh are looking to have a quiet day out, but while trying to avoid everyones problems they end up kidnapping a vicar, believing its the best think for him.
Howard becomes jealous when Marina and Miss Davenport become enamored with Jeremy, a man who claims to be an international jewel thief. When Tom discovers a safe in Aunty Wainwright's store which she can't remember the combination to, Howard puts Jeremy to the test by enlisting him to crack the safe.
After witnessing Lance trying to convince his wife that Elvis does truly indeed still live, Alvin and Entwistle conceive a plan to make The King appear.
Eva, who happens to be a woman from Alvin's past, finds a way to make Howard's life even more complicated.
Barry decides to help his lonely neighbour find a girlfriend.
Howard attempts to contact other nature lovers but finds out there are better ways than the mobile phone to do so.
Mervyn is deeply in love with 'Her' at the pizza take-away, but lacking the courage to tell her himself, he unfortunately makes the terrible mistake of letting Entwistle and Alvin try to bring them together.
Clegg and Truly reminisce fondly about their old friend Compo, who suffered at the hands of Nora Batty - and them.
Lenny, heavily-chained, is determined that he has a showbusiness future as an escapologist. Sidekick Cliff is not as enthusiastic.
Hobbo tries to find a friend for Morton and Barry is depressed when Toby moves next door.
Adopted as a baby, former milkman and undercover secret agent Hobbo is determined to trace his natural mother.
Hobbo is still having trouble getting Nelly to admit that she is his natural birth mother. To get the proof he needs, he fits Howard up with an eavesdropping wire to pick up Nelly talking to Pearl.
Hobbo is ready for any dangerous situation - and going round telling everyone that Nelly is his mother is one. Another danger arises when he demonstrates his gift of diguise, and finds himself the new recipient of Marina's affections.
Howard is deeply concerned when Pearl starts going out every day with Nelly, and she will not say where. Hobbo comes to his aid, and heads a surveillance party to follow Pearl and Nelly. When the women go into a Hell's Angels club, they decide not to be hasty, and confront them later.
When Clegg and Truly tell Hobbo that local serial groom Norris Fairburn is free again, he decides that Norris would be an ideal husband for Stella.
Hobbo turns up at the river wall with Randolph, who he hopes will bring romance into Stella's life. Randolph seems to lack any of the requirements of a potential suitor, and is limp and unattractive, especially after Hobbo drops him in the river.
Toby is beginning to realise that the benefits of going back to his ex-wife far outweigh the advantages of living alone in a sparsely furnished house with no-one to cook or clean for him.
In order that Hobbo can find out more about Nelly, his supposed mother, he has Howard eavesdrop on her when she is visiting Pearl.
When word goes around town that Old Heptonstall is looking for volunteers, Hobbo and his army of volunteers, namely Alvin and Entwistle, go and visit him without a second thought.
Hobbo and his friends attempt to help Toby win back the affections of his ex-wife. Glenda decides to try and help Morton find a woman. Howard goes into the library to let Marina know that there is a problem with their bike ride that afternoon.
Pearl throws Howard out of the house, but when he goes to Clegg's for sympathy it falls on deaf ears, while Pearl tells Nelly she's going to have to sort out Howard once and for all. Meanwhile, Glenda decides that Barry and herself are fat and that something must be done before Gloria's wedding, and forces Barry to embark on a new fitness regime. And PC Walsh informs PC Cooper that the sergeant is on their back - he's complaining about the amount of crumbs they're leaving in the car.
Howard is missing home, and Hobbo concocts various schemes to have Pearl take Howard back. Meanwhile, Barry is missing his hearty meals and Toby and Morton lament being divorced.
Hobbo and his 'team' turn Howard into a tramp to show Pearl how rough he's been living and convince her to take him back. The men pitch him a tent but Howard's isn't keen and goes for a meal with Glenda and Barry. The men return to the camp with Howard to show Pearl how much he's roughing it, but Marina arrives at the same time and Hobbo and Howard bundle her into the tent. Howard lies on an ants nest and suddenly jumps to life, along with Marina and Hobbo. Pearl sees all and is not impressed.
Wondering if Pearl still loves him, Howard asks Hobbo to give her a peck on the cheek from him - only to become even more despondent when he sees his wife deliver a passionate kiss. Meanwhile, Glenda sends Barry off to paint a landscape, hoping the activity will take his mind off his hunger - but fish and chips is the only thing on his mind.
In this final episode of the long-running comedy, everyone is getting ready for a wedding - prompting Howard and Pearl to look back at their relationship. Meanwhile, Alvin flirts with Stella, Toby tries to smarten himself up in a bid to win back Monica, and Clegg worries that he's forgotten something important.
