Bobby becomes Strickland's personal caddy and picks up some bad habits. Meanwhile, Peggy and Minh compete to donate the most blood.
Bobby's act of heroism leads the Hills to a meeting with candidate George Dub-Ya, who turns Hank's vote from sure to tentative with the shake of a hand.
Cash-flow problems plague Hank's father, who's forced to work a menial job on Veterans Day instead of marching in the parade.
The Booster Club sends a distraught Hank to talk to Peggy after she fails the football team's star fullback and gets him suspended from the team.
Bobby rejects Thanksgiving after history lessons from John Redcorn, who longs to be a real father to his illegitimate son Joseph.
While a distraught Hank tries to deal with the fact that he wasn't born in Texas, Cotton and his buddies once again make plans to assassinate Fidel Castro.
Bobby goes all-out to become school mascot, a high-profile post that suffers a low blow when he avoids a time-honored tradition.
Bill counters his holiday loneliness by becoming a generous Santa, attracting a nice single mother and a young slacker who takes advantage.
Repeated exposure to poisons forces Dale out of extermination and into a desk job that leads him back into extermination--of careers.
Peggy thinks Hank's tears are indicative of a father-son void, but they're really about his truck, which looks headed for pickup-truck heaven.
When Bobby develops an allergy to Ladybird, Hank builds a doghouse, an elaborate accommodation that's perfect--for Bobby.
Bill and former Texas governor Ann Richards hit it off after a chance meeting resulting from Hank's reluctant prank in an Austin hotel.
A female cop gets a hankerin' for Hank; Peggy accidentally brings back a native child after a school field trip to Mexico.
Bobby's ventriloquist's dummy gets more of Hank's attention than Bobby, but it's Dale who harbors a grudge against the wooden being.
Unaware that the new employee at Strickland Propane is a prostitute, Peggy becomes her best friend and even offers her a place to stay--Hank's den.
As Luanne's sponsor in a sexual-abstinence program, Peggy has to testify about her lifetime total of sexual partners--and it's more than one.
Wearing a prosthetic rump relieves Hank's back pain, but makes him the butt of friends' jokes as they all prepare for a riding-mower race.
Hank joins Bobby's environmental effort, but only to preserve a long-time cover-up concerning a mishap with Boomhauer's car in high school.
Dale plans to buy Nancy a face-lift by suing a tobacco company, which countersues--and carelessly bugs his home.
Cotton's financially strapped VFW group moves into Hank's home, prompting Hank to recruit Vietnam vets, to whom Cotton doesn't exactly cotton.
A con man offers "genius" Peggy an at-home doctorate course, which she finances with the Hills' retirement fund.
Bobby avoids a beating by high schoolers by pretending to be one of them.
A local pork producer is impressed by Luanne, who goes to his home for a job interview but comes away as his girlfriend.
Bobby goes from bullied to bully after learning a counterattack move in a self-defense class--for women.