2x12 The Deadly Years

[3.3/10] Did you know that Captain James Tiberius Kirk is a great man? And that great men can do anything? There is just not substitute for a square-jawed hero, who’s battle-tested and ready to step in to save the day.

Spare me.

Don’t get me wrong, “The Deadly Years” isn’t the first time (and I imagine it won’t be the last time) that Star Trek leans into the idea that Kirk is one of a kind and, by god, the Enterprise needs him. It may not be my favorite beat (in fact, it’s probably my least favorite next to Kirk having some sordid romantic history or irresistible animal attraction with every woman he ever meets) but normally it’s not couched in a story that is damn boring.

The senior staff of the enterprise are getting old. That’s it. That’s pretty much the whole episode. They need to figure out how to stop it. Kirk doubts that he’s getting senile and there’s a long boring trial and a lot of hemming and hawing at the awesome responsibility of sidelining a starship captain. But most of the episode is just “we’re old! What do we do!” with little really happening in the story beyond people ruminating over that fact.

The oldness itself isn’t that compelling. There’s something a little fun about seeing the makeup department go to town on making Shatner, Nimoy, Kelly, etc. look decades older than they are, and it’s generally amusing to see the actors play version of themselves a bit more feeble in body and mind. But once the novelty of that wears off (which is quickly), you’re just left with the unsatisfying camp of the whole thing.

So let’s do what I always try to do when we hit one of these episodes that I think is just godawful – talk about what’s good in it. Admittedly, that’s a bit difficult in this episode, but I’ll try. For one thing, I like that Kirk returns to using the “corbomite maneuver” from the episode of the same name. For as much as find Kirk’s convenient and sui generis leadership abilities in “The Deadly Years” a bit trying, his actions in “The Corbomite Maneuver” really showed a boldness and cleverness that set him apart, and going to that well again signifies a shorthand for Kirk’s abilities that “The Deadly Years” doesn’t exactly earn elsewhere.

I also like that as McCoy ages, he gets a little more Southern again, just like he did when he was hopped up on spores. It’s funny thinking of Bones as a genuine “country doctor” like he claims, but it sells the transition of his aging. Plus, the continuity suggests that in this professional military outfit, McCoy has downplayed his roots, but when made more emotional or less in control, he turns into a 23rd century Foghorn Leghorn as his upbringing comes out.

And while as a whole, Shatner’s performance is a bit of a mixed bag, there’s some interesting touches he uses to communicate the ways in which an elder Kirk is different from the starship captain we know. Little details like the way he uses his hands or barks in a different tone sell the distinction.

On the other hand, there’s a whole lot of tradition Shatner ACK-TING that veers way too far inot caricature. That frankly goes for the whole episode. The writers’ take on what it means to be old is fully of clichés that were tired 50 years ago – old people are forgetful, they think they’re as capable as they ever were despite obvious limitations, they don’t like being corrected or helped.

But rather than taking a deep and authentic look at what it would be like to deal with rapid aging, or even a leader losing their abilities and a crew having to deal with it, “The Deadly Years” quickly collapses into a sea of clichés and plodding reminders of Kirk’s slippage and the terrible responsibility of potentially having to relieve him of command. Again, there’s the germ of a decent idea there, in the hardship of having to tell someone you love that they can’t do what they’ve done anymore, but this episode doesn’t do much with it, just noting it’d be a hard thing in a cheesy fashion.

Nevermind the weird attempt at Casablanca-like romantic angst with the babe of the week. Again, is there any woman Kirk’s come across that he didn’t have either some instant attraction to or some colorful past with? It’s overdone melodrama at its worst as this woman we’ve just met is said to have this long backstory with Kirk, and the only the “The Deadly Years” can do to try to make it click is shoot her with a soft lens and lean on the usual clichés. It’s really the pits, even as Kirk romances go, with a totally unmotivated and unconvincing connection between the two, and soap opera-style melodrama to boot.

Then there’s the accompanying commodore who initiates the proceedings to sideline Kirk while he’s aging. I’m glad that, for once, the Starfleet admiralty are not wholly evil or craven, but he’s still made incompetent for pretty weak reasons in the story. Again, the commodore is right – Kirk is less than himself and having a forgetful person who snaps at the people who help him would leave him as a less-than-effective commander of the ship.

That just makes it feels even dumber when the commodore takes over and immediately screws up a situation with the Romulans, only for Kirk to recover from a miracle serum developed just in the nick of time for him to run to the bridge and save the day.(As an aside, the “Chekov was scared” epiphany being the key to the cure is a pretty weak, convenient plot solution here).

What are we to take from this? That the commodore was a desk jockey and so rank aside, he should never have taken command even if it would have meant a junior officer taking over for him? (In fairness, I think acting Captain Sulu would have done pretty well!). Are we to believe that battle-tested Kirk, no matter how diminished his capacities, should have stayed in the captain’s chair? It’s not clear what side “The Deadly Years” wants the audience to be on.

At best, it’s a little inconsistent and incoherent, basically saying that Kirk shouldn’t have been in charge in his present state but neither should the commodore. (So what, then, should they have done?) At worst, it suggests that Kirk is just so inherently great that he should never be relieved of command, no matter how erratic is. Either way, the whole thing, misguided as it seems, would have been much more tolerable if it weren’t so utterly boring. I can tolerate a lot of bad story choices, a lot of bad character choices, even a lot of points that I heartily disagree with in my television shows, but turning your forty-four minute story into an utter slog, which this absolutely was, is something tough for me to get over. Keep this episode on the senior circuit.